Blog : 3

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5/30/2018 7:31 am

What turns us on? When does it start and how does it develop, is it within the DNA, are we pre-programmed in terms of desires?

For myself I have always had kinky thoughts, yet was not exposed to any perverts or similar when I was young and , nor did I meet older people who have shaped me as a young . But I can always remember having odd thoughts, I loved seeing the occasional and unexpected view of a girl/woman showing off more than the thought, or getting to look down a woman's top. I can recall doing these things when young.

My first masturbation memory is at age 7/8.

As I grew into a young I loved seeing other people make out, hands disappearing into blouses or up skirts made me aroused. I was sexually active within my own peer group but loved seeing others, just did not understand why. This was before the internet, I had not heard of exhibitionism or<b> voyeurism. </font></b>I remember seeing a girl getting finger fucked by a guy other than her boyfriend, and this seemed even more arousing. I had my first fuck at 14 and although I enjoyed sex there always felt to be something missing.

When I was 19 or so I discovered Men's magazines such as Fiesta and Knave, anyone else remembers those? The reader's letters and reader wives photos were such an eye opener, I now realised that I loved slutty girls, if they were cheating on their husbands this was even more exciting, although I still had no idea why.

It was my first serious girlfriend that filled in the blanks. By this time I was middle 20's
I came home early from work, we lived in a room in a shared house, she was 20 I was 26, We had only known each other about three months. I saw her bag in the room and thought she must have gone into town, then I heard the groans coming from the room next door, where a friend of the landlord was staying.
Of course, I knew who was making the sounds instantly, no surprise being able to recognise your own lover, how she sounds when she is on heat, turned on. What was a surprise was the raging hard-on I got just as instantly, it almost hurt. I didn't understand it, with each groan and moan I heard my erection throbbed more and more. My breathing was shallow and quick, and I stayed as quiet and still as I could, not to avoid them being aware, but because I wanted to hear every detail I could.
My mind was working almost on auto, I knew as instantly as my cock get hard that I would not interfere, did not want to interfere….
There would be no knocking on the door or barging into the room, my thoughts were only, how can I find out more!

Why was the thought of my girlfriend spreading her legs for another man so exciting, so raw? All I could think of was the guy’s cock fucking into her cunt, and the feelings I had.
I thought these kinky perversions were out of this world.. I listened and stood on the landing, cock out, not daring to touch myself because I knew I would just shoot off, it was a shared house and the landlord and his girlfriend were downstairs, they could walk up any time, but that thought was of no concern, the landlord probably knew his friend was fucking my girlfriend…..and that also turned me on perversely, but again I had no explanation for that.

I could not resist looking to the keyhole of the door, I could not see a great deal, She was on top of him and naked, I could see her small tits, and that alone was enough to surge some pre-cum on to my cock head, her being on top seemed to represent her total desire for another cock, she was not getting fucked, she was fucking him.

The whole episode lasted about thirty seconds and I stepped back from the door. I was sweating and feeling things I simply could not explain. My unfaithful girlfriend giving her body to a total stranger, he had only arrived the day before, why did I love it so much.
At that moment I would have agreed to anything to have been able to stand behind her watching that cock fuck her and hear her cum.

I stood up and walked to the bathroom, and then I heard her coming, groaning and screaming, and my spunk just shot everywhere.
I left the house and came back about an hour later, she knew I had been home, she was in tears, saying she had not meant it to happen, I just said it was ok and not to worry... I could not say how I had felt... I did not understand it...

The next few days were a bit difficult, not because of what she had done, but because of my feelings about it, I had masturbated so many times a day I had lost count, the images, thoughts and sounds all kept coming back to me.

It was about four days later that I started to touch her sexually, I was nervous, as was Jacqui, but I suspect for different reasons, I was fingering her cunt while she slowly wanked me, all I could think of was her fucking the other guy, and wondering if there were others, and suddenly I found myself asking her what turned her on, did she have fantasies?
What was her biggest turn on?
Of course, I was hoping she would tell me it was having other men so that I could use my hard cock to give me the courage to tell her how excited it made me.
She was reluctant to say much, she admitted she was worried about how I might react after the way she had behaved. Fortunately, a hard cock dis-engages the fear part of the brain, so I was able to confess that I wanted to hear about what had happened previously with the guy, and I wanted to hear because it turned me on so much. She told me everything.

But why did it excite me so much, and where did the original desires come from, because they were always there.


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