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infinitepoetess 54F
6426 posts
7/13/2020 11:38 am
A Slave's Strength of Will



Strength of will, is one of the most valuable characteristics of a good sub/slave. I have been told this is something desirable because no one wants a doormat. It's why intelligence is also a highly attractive trait. Creativity rates highly, because of possible longevity and keeping fresh and new in your relationship. But strength of will is vital.

But, you know what frosts my ass?
Every time I read something about slaves being doormats or that they have no limits, I see pink going red quickly. I've said here before, my propensity to be a slave has to do with amount of commitment and depth of bond, as well as depth of devotion. There may be an agreement between me and my master that I never question what he says. But that is between me and him, just like any other relationship. It has very little to do with my brain or personality lacking. I can assure you, I am bright, vibrant, opinionated, and have boundaries. For fuck sake, nothing else happens easily, why would slavery be mindless?

It likely stems from the minds eye of what is the definition of a slave, since most associated it with the slavery of the African Americans or the slave sex traders. If this is your viewpoint, you need to get educated.

The reason there is more depth within M/s, is because both parties must give their all and become vulnerable, with our skeletons and fears all out in the open. Not to mention that when you become exposed, you cannot think only of your wants and desires. The slave is deeper in their submission (willing to have less input) because to do something with a smile even though you hate it, is a whole other bag than doing something you like with a smile. It takes strength of character and will.

A slave does not make demands, they relinquish, even when they want to stomp their feet. It is a humbling feeling to accept the requirements with grace. It is selfless, not in the least weak or mindless. And this is why the bond becomes so deep.

Most people shy away and some place judgments about supposed atrocities imagined to make the shallow or impatient feel better. You cannot take a slave responsibly without building the bond over time with layers upon layers of devoted protocols, communication and a certain amount of co-dependent obsession.

So stop with the no limits, doormat stuff, please

It is about time, during this revolution of racism and hatred, that we remove the stigmas surrounding slaves within our communities.

Song addition for this post
Slave to Love -Bryan Ferry


JoElspanstp 70M

7/13/2020 11:41 am

All you say is true. Live the life!


DancingDom 74M
22476 posts
7/13/2020 11:47 am

Having a moniker of "slave" is nebulous these days. Fine line between submissive & slave. Most taking the title are often not slave. But are as you indicated very committed and have a strong bond.

"One Big Sky Covers Us All Equally"


Kruture 49M  
478 posts
7/13/2020 11:52 am

Exactly the type of bond I've been working on building with my potential slave. Inspire her to submission as she's not a doormat. Well said!


JohnnyLightning 65M  
9548 posts
7/13/2020 1:37 pm

My belief is that most women that use the "doormat" tagline have had bad relations with abusive men that have walked all over them. The blm movement has over-stepped the slavery agenda.

I agree with you that the bond and trust are deeper in M/s relations.

Howling at the moon and mal ad osteo.


drmgirl622 68F  
25884 posts
7/13/2020 3:24 pm

I've always thought of a slave as someone with "no limits" but never have i thought of it in the context you presented.


infinitepoetess 54F
3499 posts
7/13/2020 5:23 pm

    Quoting DancingDom:
    Having a moniker of "slave" is nebulous these days. Fine line between submissive & slave. Most taking the title are often not slave. But are as you indicated very committed and have a strong bond.
The porotocols between slave and master are variant to those involved, no different than any other relationship. To have something else would be unsustainable. I have lived 24/7 in M/s and our agreement was that I did not question. Now, that doesnt mean Im going to blindly not question all the time. I am human.


infinitepoetess 54F
3499 posts
7/13/2020 5:24 pm

    Quoting JoElspanstp:
    All you say is true. Live the life!
Doing it every day I can thank you


infinitepoetess 54F
3499 posts
7/13/2020 5:24 pm

    Quoting Kruture:
    Exactly the type of bond I've been working on building with my potential slave. Inspire her to submission as she's not a doormat. Well said!
And what makes your slave different than having a sub?


infinitepoetess 54F
3499 posts
7/13/2020 5:26 pm

    Quoting  :

Perhaps the answer lies in your negotiation of the relationship starting.
I did not start out a slave, But after living M/s for 10 years, it was inevitable that I would be at a more advanced stage and seek that same level of intensity in the next relationship.


infinitepoetess 54F
3499 posts
7/13/2020 5:27 pm

    Quoting JohnnyLightning:
    My belief is that most women that use the "doormat" tagline have had bad relations with abusive men that have walked all over them. The blm movement has over-stepped the slavery agenda.

    I agree with you that the bond and trust are deeper in M/s relations.
That is a very viable opinion as it happens very often. Or a slave has an M/s relationship end and does not want to go to that depth again for fear of being adrift in the sea afterwards for a time. The intensity level can be taxing for sure


infinitepoetess 54F
3499 posts
7/13/2020 5:28 pm

    Quoting drmgirl622:
    I've always thought of a slave as someone with "no limits" but never have i thought of it in the context you presented.
Yes I added that now because thats the other myth.
You can't submit as a slave right off the bat without loads of experience and time pushing limits. It just doesnt work like that. It is more to do with a look in that slave's eyes when she is told to do something. She complies even though she may not want to


infinitepoetess 54F
3499 posts
7/13/2020 5:29 pm

    Quoting drmgirl622:
    I've always thought of a slave as someone with "no limits" but never have i thought of it in the context you presented.
And she finds joy in her service. This is not always true of a sub unless they are service oriented


EvolvedEdge 57M
296 posts
7/13/2020 9:50 pm

What we call things in the context of the exchange... one of my favorite rabbit holes in the lifestyle. ... perhaps all the more because I very deliberately don’t tend to allow honorifics to trip too-easily of the tongue!

... and agreed- the whole doormat-slave thing could do with an unceremonious end.


maletramp 64M
2092 posts
7/14/2020 4:35 am

It's always amazed me, but never surprises, that the most bigoted view points about sexuality seem to occur WITHIN the BDSM sphere.

In your case, it has always been obvious, you're very bright, articulate, charming, adventurous, fun and sophisticated. You personify man's ambition. And your "slavery" would only be possible to the man who has earned your trust; acquired because of his value, not because of your insecurities.

To some feminists a man "acquiring" a female is disgusting, and there is validity to such thoughts. But when the woman herself adores being the target of a great man's intense longing; the object of his constant, acute desires; the charm that raises his own being to levels that he knew not were within him, such passionate adoration is the ultimate praise. To be worthy of his slave is hopefully the true intent of every "dom" male.

And perhaps one way I can reveal that for you: You draw the dom male out of my being. Perhaps it is necessary for you to defend yourself to those inferiors that somehow mistake you for a doormat. You can rest easy that the men on this site, sub and dom alike, know you for the exquisite womanly delight known as the Poetess.


aHedonist 51M
7510 posts
7/15/2020 8:12 am

The core difficulty lies in incomprehension. A Dom/me or submissive is going to relate to this in their own terms of reference, never quite understanding that in fact D/s and M/s are chalk and cheese.

The fundamental difference between D/s and M/s is that in D/s the collar signifies rights given by a submissive to be taken by a Dominant. Those rights are mostly defined and are "on loan" until further notice. Submissives submit, and per the Cambridge dictionary submit means "to yield to governance or authority"

In M/s the collar signifies the handing over of self to the slave and the obligation to safeguard that to a Master. When we spoke of this I instinctively put the obligations upon a Master in front of any rights that may come with them because if the obligations are not upheld then the rights fall forfeit... and those I would consider to be Masters or Mistresses in the M/s sense (rather than the ubiquitous MasterBaters) would just about universally agree with that I'd imagine.
Slaves do not submit.... slaves surrender. Big difference.

"When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be" - Lao Tzu

You cannot hold self and become something more. And the surrender of self not just once but over and over.... is not an easy thing to do and takes an incredible amount of willpower anchored in trust.

If they'd but understand the fucking verbiage they'd get it, but yanno....I'm just a guy in a skirt.


infinitepoetess 54F
3499 posts
7/15/2020 6:34 pm

    Quoting EvolvedEdge:
    What we call things in the context of the exchange... one of my favorite rabbit holes in the lifestyle. ... perhaps all the more because I very deliberately don’t tend to allow honorifics to trip too-easily of the tongue!

    ... and agreed- the whole doormat-slave thing could do with an unceremonious end.
Yes yes yes


infinitepoetess 54F
3499 posts
7/15/2020 6:38 pm

    Quoting aHedonist:
    The core difficulty lies in incomprehension. A Dom/me or submissive is going to relate to this in their own terms of reference, never quite understanding that in fact D/s and M/s are chalk and cheese.

    The fundamental difference between D/s and M/s is that in D/s the collar signifies rights given by a submissive to be taken by a Dominant. Those rights are mostly defined and are "on loan" until further notice. Submissives submit, and per the Cambridge dictionary submit means "to yield to governance or authority"

    In M/s the collar signifies the handing over of self to the slave and the obligation to safeguard that to a Master. When we spoke of this I instinctively put the obligations upon a Master in front of any rights that may come with them because if the obligations are not upheld then the rights fall forfeit... and those I would consider to be Masters or Mistresses in the M/s sense (rather than the ubiquitous MasterBaters) would just about universally agree with that I'd imagine.
    Slaves do not submit.... slaves surrender. Big difference.

    "When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be" - Lao Tzu

    You cannot hold self and become something more. And the surrender of self not just once but over and over.... is not an easy thing to do and takes an incredible amount of willpower anchored in trust.

    If they'd but understand the fucking verbiage they'd get it, but yanno....I'm just a guy in a skirt.
Perfection as always. You are the better half of me on this post for sure. You said it so eloquently as well.

Within that surrender, others outside of it will see it as "no limits" because that is the only way they can grasp or verbalize what it is they see in M/s. Because we are in it, it is so clear to us and sets us into another mind space of knowledge based deductions, I am sure.


infinitepoetess 54F
3499 posts
7/15/2020 6:39 pm

    Quoting maletramp:
    It's always amazed me, but never surprises, that the most bigoted view points about sexuality seem to occur WITHIN the BDSM sphere.

    In your case, it has always been obvious, you're very bright, articulate, charming, adventurous, fun and sophisticated. You personify man's ambition. And your "slavery" would only be possible to the man who has earned your trust; acquired because of his value, not because of your insecurities.

    To some feminists a man "acquiring" a female is disgusting, and there is validity to such thoughts. But when the woman herself adores being the target of a great man's intense longing; the object of his constant, acute desires; the charm that raises his own being to levels that he knew not were within him, such passionate adoration is the ultimate praise. To be worthy of his slave is hopefully the true intent of every "dom" male.

    And perhaps one way I can reveal that for you: You draw the dom male out of my being. Perhaps it is necessary for you to defend yourself to those inferiors that somehow mistake you for a doormat. You can rest easy that the men on this site, sub and dom alike, know you for the exquisite womanly delight known as the Poetess.
I am humbled, thank you very much for such kind words


infinitepoetess 54F
3499 posts
7/16/2020 7:00 pm

    Quoting  :

Yes, aH did nail it
Great point to add, but then as we all know, there is a certain comfort zone that eventually happens over time in 24/7. My late master and I went through those changes. We were closer and yet the novelty had worn off a bit.
Hugs and cuddles



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