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Saying "no" is one of life's most important skills. I need to learn to practice this skill asap. How about you?
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Ex This is such an important self - protection topic! Thank you for posting I can say "No" sometimes and I hope you too learn ! A life spent making mistakes is not only more honorable, but more useful than a life spent doing nothing. George Bernard Shaw Jenny
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Thats the 'positive side' of my lack of upbringing... i never really learned all those suppressive behaviour, to please others. It is, i believe, something that is specially taught/ imprinted to girls and women. I see that kind of behaviour on the play ground, when i pick my Chinese children up, from school. Girls please others, (manipulate others) and also teachers tell girls to play "nice", i never heard one teacher tell that to the boys, ever! And that, an sich, is instutionalized, internalized sexism. Also, following courses to be and act assertive, in the Womens Liberation Movement, i also learned that i dont have to give any reason why i say no. Watch men say no to things, they almost never come with any motivation or excuses, or reasons.... NO is an answer too. I dó understand that it can be, or feel (very?) dangerous to say NO for the first time. To something, or someone... It is also a very liberating feeling. My bottle neck is wanting to share, sometimes too much, or to give, too much.
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I am lacking in a few important skills but thankfully, saying and sticking by my "no's " is not one of them.
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you gotta know when to hold them know when to fold them know when to walk away know when to run
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Hmmmm ExName, does this mean that I should start asking My sub in a way that their no would mean yes? LOL just kidding. I do agree with you and saying NO or turning something down is not a bad habit and at times should be practiced. Well after all thats what made Me who I am today. Was always considered to be a rebel and fully enjoyed it then and now as well.
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When I went to catholic school it was all about pleasing and being polite. My life was a series of pleasing and I've learned to only worry about me. Now pleasing Mistress is a completely different story but we can always discuss.
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Maybe some people are afraid to say no because they might not ever get a chance to say yes.
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Ex, A friend of mine told once me that "NO" is a complete sentence. It took a while for that to sink in. But once it did, I had no problem saying the word again. (In that fashion). Great topic, Ex. xx "Men need to hunt. She obviously understands this. She’s offering herself as prey. Not easy prey. But willing.”
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"No" is a complete sentence. To thine own self be true. Howling at the moon and mal ad osteo.
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Saying "no" is one of life's most important skills. I need to learn to practice this skill asap. How about you?
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Great post, thank you
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ExName, I think, maybe, it is also about bounderies, too Selfrespect, maybe? I am sometimes, not good at setting my bounderies. Or, think, other people will automatically respect my bounderies.... As i try to do theirs... Not so! alas And, being totally surprised, in a bad way, they act the way they do.. try to walk all over me...
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