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pac369 64F  
10504 posts
7/2/2022 10:47 am

Last Read:
7/4/2022 9:06 am

Affection...

How affectionate are you? My sub gf and pac have discussed this lately. How we had felt when our past Dom's arrived at a restaurant before us. And how they greeted us when we arrived. Did they get up from the table and hug us, and maybe even grab a little bit of ass. Or did they do nothing as we slid in the booth across from them...

Naturally affection varies based on the depth and length of your relationship. As a whole though. pac would rather have a bit too much affection versus very little or none at all...

Because the mind goes t o bad places when you think your Dom doesn't want t o give you affection, especially in public. You wonder what you did wrong? Or how you displeased him. Even so far as worrying about what you're wearing. And if you're Dom's still attracted t o you. All usually overreactions. But just a place pac's mind has gone many times...

Its easy t o be secure and comfortable in the real world. Yet still revert back t o insecurities with your Dom. Whose approval means the most t o us...

We subs are a unique and sometimes needy bunch in general. But if our Dom doesn't pay the necessary attention t o us, there will always be problems in pac's mind!




~ Physical strength is measured by what we carry. Inner strength is measured by what we can bear. ~


pac369 64F  
12700 posts
7/2/2022 10:48 am

This sub doesn't do being ignored very well at all...

~ Physical strength is measured by what we carry. Inner strength is measured by what we can bear. ~


drmgirl622 68F  
26104 posts
7/2/2022 11:26 am

Just feeling their attention and caring settles the mind and soul.


pac369 replies on 7/2/2022 4:33 pm:
Absolutely drmgirl!
And feels the exact opposite when
it doesn’t happen…

rondiri 65M
11173 posts
7/2/2022 12:38 pm

Affection and attention, IMO, are a must. If you can't give both, have a relationship with Alexa or Siri or a rubber doll.


pac369 replies on 7/2/2022 4:40 pm:
Excellent points Ron!
I totally agree….

Suzy_Que 53T
1245 posts
7/2/2022 2:36 pm

I don;t go out in public as Suzy so this doesn't affect me as much, but I couldn't handle a Dom/partner who was not affectionate. I think I am somewhat insecure, especially about my feminine appearance, and definitely feed off of reinforcement.

I've never been in an actual Dom/sub relationship, so I can't speak about how that dynamic works, but I just melt when he kisses me, holds me, touches me, and yes, grabs my ass. I love to sit on his lap with his arms around me, making me feel safe and protected, and all of these help greatly in bringing out the Suzy side of me. It came as a bit of a surprise to me that even our spanking sessions have a definite feeling of affection to them, which may be why I love it so.


pac369 replies on 7/2/2022 5:33 pm:
Right on Suzy!
And I feel the same way about my own
feminine appearance sometimes...
So I really understand...

NoNonsense_Dom 70M  
1538 posts
7/2/2022 5:53 pm

Pac, you mentioned the real world in your post, and how easy it is to be comfortable. Well for me, there should be NO difference between this world and what you call the real world. Honesty is honesty in whatever world you live in, and affection/love is the same, just as Respect and Open communication are essential. Whether it be your dominant or your bf/gf/hubby or wife, those things matter ALL the time.

Now I can be aloof at times, and can sometimes be a little less outgoing than normal, but that is ME and the pressures/stresses of life are the main cause of this (40 plus years of military and government work being the main drain on my inner self), but that does not mean I have less affection or love for a partner. What it means is that I have to be totally honest with that partner so they KNOW my mood, and can brush that aloofness to one side when it raises it's ugly head. Hey WE dominants need a little TLC at times too, after all, we are only human.


pac369 replies on 7/2/2022 6:21 pm:
Ok NN!
I will give you that. As everyone needs TLC sometimes. And yes I did mention the real world. And how we function in the vanilla part of it.
I was a self-assured professional when working. Yet can turn into a self-conscious mess at times around my Dom.
Is all I was trying to say...

JohnnyLightning 65M  
9669 posts
7/2/2022 9:35 pm

It's important to keep the slave or sub docile. Nobody likes a bitchy woman even though life's a bitch then you marry one.

Howling at the moon and mal ad osteo.


pac369 replies on 7/4/2022 9:03 am:
Well Johnny!
I don't even know how to respond to that...

jenny14 75T  
90348 posts
7/2/2022 10:29 pm

pac

This is another wonderful post and illustrates that the Life-Style is NOT just " over my knees for a spanking and then suck my cock!"

It is a relationship and even dom/mes need warmth too! There is nothing submissive for a dom/me to hug or kiss their sub in public


A life spent making mistakes is not only more honorable, but more useful than a life spent doing nothing. George Bernard Shaw

Jenny


pac369 replies on 7/4/2022 9:04 am:
Exactly Jenny!
I so agree...

casio26 63M
2561 posts
7/3/2022 4:20 am

I'm very affectionate. I've never been fulfilled Pac


pac369 replies on 7/3/2022 10:41 am:
Really sorry to hear that Dave...

Mssis 48F

7/4/2022 2:42 am

I can't even imagine having a sub that is not affectionate to me, or vice versa.


pac369 replies on 7/4/2022 9:05 am:
For sure M!
It just would never feel right with
no or little affection...


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