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Opinions will ALWAYS vary Article in comments  |
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I’ve written and posted over 100 articles about our lifestyle. Most of them, there isn’t any outcry about. But a few, usually the ones I least expect it about, garner a lot of discussion and objections to. Why? Because in BDSM and throughout the community, never mind the world, everyone has their own opinion. That’s NOT a bad thing. In BDSM, there are so many degrees of participation, degrees of intensity, so many different kinks and fetishes and then on top of that, so many different interpretations of kinks, fetishes, definitions and ways of doing things, that it’s impossible for 1005 of the Community to agree on everything. I’ve been removed from “Traditionalist” groups, for being too modern in my thinking. I’ve been removed from TNG groups for being too “traditionalist” in my thinking. There was a time, long ago, before the internet or the making of specific movies depicting the lifestyle, that there were fewer differences, but there STILL were differences no matter how far you go back in the history of BDSM. What I am finding now, is that “acceptance” of other’s opinions are more likely to be ignored, shunned, call a red flag, called not only untrue, but dangerous by people that have a different opinion and believe without doubt, their opinion is the ONE opinion. As a Community, I’ve always felt that we have to allow people their own opinion. We can defend our own opinions, give the logic we are using in our opinion. But if there is no definitive proof about a topic, opinions will vary and we are all allowed to own an opinion. So folks, if your opinion doesn’t match someone else’s, don’t assume that person isn’t knowledgeable, trying to help, dangerous a fraud, a predator, etc, without looking deeper than the one opinion. The NDSM Community asks the world to be more accepting of our lifestyle. But why should ANYONE accept our lifestyle if we continually attack those in the lifestyle that have a differing opinion from our own? We have all learned the lifestyle from different writings, different people, all with their OWN opinions and points of view on the lifestyle and everything that goes into the lifestyle. The different combinations may be correct, or not. All we can do as a Community is try to help one another and accept one another based on a body of work, actions and practices each of us has done and shown. Not on one opinion or interpretation, that differs from our own. You want YOUR opinion known? Teach it, write about it, spread YOUR word. Find out yourself how well it is received, before criticizing another. You may be surprised at the reactions you get, just as much as I have been. © 12/15/22 Ronald Dirienzo
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Yea, good read.....I have watched changing views over the last 50+ years all around the world. Sometimes the old saying comes to mind " Don't confuse them with the facts, their mind is made up"  
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It's a 6....It's a 9......actually I thought it might be a q
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sometimes this becomes more than opinion, it becomes validation.
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12/16/2022 3:31 am |
Well said. I was raised to accept people for who they were and for what they believed in. That did not mean I had to change my thinking. Just know that there are differences. The same as colour of skin or religion, just accept that, that is what they think or are. So if someone wants to believe something, easy, let them. Not my life, let me believe what i believe. We may merge together, we may not, but why create stress over really nothing.
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Well here is how it is for me.... I date vanilla and I date BDSM.... I don't aspire to move in with a DOM full time so I have dates usually a steady boyfriend... Vanilla guys want to make out with me receive a BJ then BF me.... BDSM guys want to dominate own me as a slave gurl.... I'm a player not waiting a lifetime for the perfect guy to cum along communicate forever talk it into the ground I'm very action oriented that's just ME👅
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12/16/2022 4:38 am |
Yes. Opinions are like ass holes - everyone has one. And some are prettier (and tighter) than others.  It is obvious that you put a LOT of thought into your Blog Posts. But it seems to me that sometimes you think too much. i prefer to "hit the high spots" (the most important preferences to me and to Him) before we get started and then work out the small stuff as we go along. Start out with vanilla or "BDSM lite" and slowly work up as we both get comfortable. Brandy and i have much in common. My "gurl name" is Kate Coxuker. It is who i am and what i do. 
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12/16/2022 4:44 am |
Oh. i just noticed the little copywrite at the bottom of your post. i'm not sure that works on here, but it IS a nice touch.  Anyone who has read much of your stuff would KNOW it was yours.  My "gurl name" is Kate Coxuker. It is who i am and what i do.
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The replies validate the subject
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What is "the NDSM community"?? Do you realize that if you don't register your copyright it isn't valid?
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What is "the NDSM community"??
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Great topic as our opinion is mostly derived from our perspective. Relativity is a hell of a concept to understand when trying to convey trust and engage in effective communication for the purpose of a meaningful relationship
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