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Silence is Poison article in comments |
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It has always struck me as strange, that a lifestyle that has Communication as one of the four pillars, would also have a prevalent protocol of silence by the submissive. Two of the most prevalent protocols in Old Guard thought, is silence by the submissive and eyes always lowered by the submissive. For me, both protocols seemed highly unproductive when it came to Communication. Obviously, at least to me, free speech gives way to a wealth of knowledge about the submissives view points, likes, current interests and thought process. My submissive and I are in an almost constant conversation, whether by text or when we are together about just about everything. Doesn’t matter if she is at work or in my home. In the same room, or different rooms. We talk. Sometimes I start, or bring up a subject, sometimes she does. Through this open Communication, I can read her moods, assess how much pain she is in from an old injury and since she has trouble asking for anything, due to past partners berating her for asking for anything, I can get clues to what she needs, wants and is possibly hinting at, rather than asking. (Yes, we are working on the trust issue in the asking. All in good time.) In the same respect, eye contact can be used as a Communication tool also. Whoever came up with the silence protocol must never have heard that the eyes are the window to the soul. Looking into her eyes, I can see if my submissive is happy or sad, playful or exhausted, angry or content. Her eyes give me direction on how to proceed. Is tickling the right thing to do? Or holding her and asking what is wrong? Now I know what some will say. It’s easy to hide emotions, put on a brave face so you can’t read anything in the eyes. Well, it’s a lot easier to do that when your eyes are ALWAYS downcast and you only have to hide your emotions for brief periods when Master says to look up. I don’t believe in mind readers. We all need more than body language to know what is going on inside the minds of one another. Communication is so important to our lifestyle and dynamics succeeding, that every form of Communication should be accessed to the fullest. Verbalization, body language, and eye contact all can be used to communicate either apart or as a group. One requires we open our ears and listen, and HEAR all that is said. The other two require us to open our eyes and SEE, then translate to LISTEN to what the eyes and body are telling you. If we ignore any of the three ways to read the submissives, we are creating a silence that can linger and foment until it may be too late to correct the situation, or we say or do the wrong thing at the wrong time and make a situation worse. I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again. Communication is the first and most important pillar we have. It leads to all the others and strengthens them. But only if we use it properly and fully. © 1/29/23 Ronald Dirienzo
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I think you are right on with your comment rondiri, I agree with you fully, even if some have wayward opinions of YOUR BLOG COMMENT!  
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To communicate without speaking isn't silence! What you do speaks louder than any words and the most important part of communication is listening. The type of communication between two people is unique to them, despite your wayward opinions. The eyes and the body communicate. You are the one that seems to have the wayward philosophical opinion every day. AND if you go back and read past posts, you will find one titled: LISTENING The above article even emphasizes Listening TWICE! Once with verbal communication, and then with the body and eyes. I even capitalized it once. You need glasses?
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i could never serve someone who keeps my head and eyes cast downward. head up and eyes forward. it takes time to learn all visual communication clues and they can still be misinterpreted along with verbal ones. in all relationships both partners need to grow. not necessarily at the same time or rate but each should grow within the relationship. imho, Lady Lee
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The communication between the Dominant using voice and handling, and the sub using eyes and body language make such beautiful conversations. I certainly love speaking that silent language
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I think you are right on with your comment rondiri, I agree with you fully, even if some have wayward opinions of YOUR BLOG COMMENT! 
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i could never serve someone who keeps my head and eyes cast downward. head up and eyes forward. it takes time to learn all visual communication clues and they can still be misinterpreted along with verbal ones. in all relationships both partners need to grow. not necessarily at the same time or rate but each should grow within the relationship. imho, Lady Lee
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