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The Dangers of our lifestyle article in comments |
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I don’t think anyone, that has been in our lifestyle, and been in a dynamic, would not agree that there are inherent dangers to a BDSM lifestyle. Even a dynamic with no scene play, has the danger of the Dominant traumatizing the submissive emotionally and mentally. That is why I will ALWAYS write about the dangers of our lifestyle and the safety measures to take in order to at least attempt to be safer. Some people have said, that what I write makes them think twice about entering the lifestyle. Well, I think that’s a good thing. Everyone SHOULD think twice about the dangers and if it is worth the risks involved in the lifestyle. Entering the lifestyle SHOULDN’T be on an impulse. It should be with an informed decision, decided upon after learning not only the exciting, sexy parts of the lifestyle, but the risks and dangers. The ins and outs of searching for the right partner and how to incorporate the lifestyle into your daily life. Others have said that I overstate the dangers. That every one of us has to decide on the dangers individually. And I totally agree each individual has the right to take whatever risks they want. But I will continue to attempt to convey just what those risks are for those that don’t have the experience, so that they do not learn the hard way. Others have said I’m full of shit and I have no idea what I’m talking about. But I’ll pit my years of experience against anyone’s. And while I know I’m not perfect, I am honest and will give you a straight answer or article. What you do with the information, is completely up to you. It angers me to read posts of submissives that have been traumatized. That there are abusers out there preying on novices and experienced submissives alike with, really, no one to stop them. There is no BDSM court, no way to “out” the abusers to the world, effectively. So I write and post on the safety issues, the dangers and other topics. I write what I believe, what I feel is true, safe for the submissive, and how a respectable Dominant should conduct themselves. Am I the final word on all of it? Of course not. Just like any author of any book or website on BDSM and the lifestyle, I write my opinion. No one HAS to follow what I write or the advice I give. There are hundreds of websites and books you can read to get opinions. Some will be different, some will be similar, some will be the same. Maybe at one time there was a “standard”. But those days are long gone. Life evolves, the lifestyle evolves. But the safety and danger issues are a constant. Their only evolution is in the how much greater the issues are today. The internet and fictionalized descriptions of the lifestyle have opened the floodgates to scammer, abusers and the dangers that come with them. BDSM is no longer the “secret society” of yore. The lifestyle has exploded in popularity and enthusiast. And wherever you got that, you get the sharks circling. So whether you like my writings or not, remember the dangers. From impact play, to mind games, electro play, fire play, hypno play or any other kink and fetish. They ALL have dangers and you better trust implicitly who you play with, or blindly accept the risks to you safety, health and wellbeing. Research before you play, know what you are getting yourself into and who you are getting into it with. Your life may depend on it, certainly your health does. © 2/2/23 Ronald Dirienzo
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No Breath play No Fisting No Knives... And that's just for starters🤪
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Ron I totally agree and push the safety and well-being factors with whoever I might be chatting with. I am not really a fan of fisting, but if someone who has been into it before coming to me, wants to do it then OK. Just over or about 10 years ago now, there was a alcohol fuelled sex party taking place on a north coast beach in New South Wales, and part of the play was a female was fisted in the cunt and possibly the arse as well. Anyway, because of the alcohol, nobody noticed that she had sustained internal injuries and was bleeding. They went to sleep and in the morning she was found dead. The 2 guys being real geniuses then panicked and tried to burn her body. It was later found and Police were called. They tracked down the 2 guys involved and eventually put them before the courts. As a result, the 2 are now doing jail time. This can be found on Google. Another instance during breath play by a husband and wife couple went a little further than it should have. This was written about here on ALT by the wife. Anyway, she sustained damage to her windpipe/throat area as well as having some dizziness and balance issues. This was the first time that they tried breath play. She was lucky not to have suffocated or brain damage as a result. So I am totally into making sure that newbie subs/slaves/dominants are aware of the risks of our lifestyle. They are encouraged to research everything before they decide to play. As a dominant, IT is MY responsibility to ensure the safety and well-being of my sub/slave, and if I am unsure then we either don't do it or we do it under controlled circumstances where they can be physically observed and assessed along the way. If something was to go wrong then medical assistance would be called immediately. Which brings me to aftercare. No sub or slave should be allowed to just get up and go after a particularly rough/physical or gruelling session. If they are wounded, then address the situation with creams , antiseptic wipes or dressings and keep them with you so that you can monitor them, regardless of how they say they feel. Concussion is real and can have lasting effects. I can go on, but you get where I am coming from and why. Ron you keep doing what you believe in mate.
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good you're bringing this out. As a new submissive, I would have never thought some of these scenarios were possible.
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No Breath play No Fisting No Knives... And that's just for starters🤪
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Brandy girl you can do breath play that does NOT include choking, and is reasonably safe, and you can watch their reaction up close. It involves you the dominant puting your mouth over their nose and mouth and preventing them from inhaling or exhaling by the use of your lungs, and you watch their eyes to see how they are experiencing things
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always... Safety first.
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