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Vent article in comments |
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There are few people in the world that keep all their feelings and doubts inside them. Most of us need someone to talk to, get advice or just let off steam to. In other words, vent. Venting may have a bad connotation for many people. They view it as someone ranting and raving to let off steam about an issue. Obviously, in the BDSM Lifestyle, and in a BDSM dynamic, we don’t want our partner losing control of themselves and ranting and raving about issues. Whether the issues are in the dynamic, or in life in general. But, talking out issues calmly with someone you respect can have a soothing effect. For submissives, that person should be their Dominant, if they don’t go to a family member or close friend. And if the submissive goes to a family member or close friend, the Dominant should not take it personally. The three are different kinds of relationships and trusts. And some submissives don’t want to vent to their Dominant and place the weight of the venting on their shoulders if it isn’t about the dynamic. Not to mention, a third or fourth persons point of view about the issue being vented never hurts. But where does a Dominant go to vent? Believe it or not, a submissive should be able to handle a Dominant’s venting if done in a calm manner, and it concerns something the submissive can help with. A submissive massaging a Dominant’s temples as the Dominant unstresses about something can be very helpful to the Dominant. Often someone venting just needs someone to listen, not come up with answers. Both Dominant and submissives should feel secure in venting about issues in the dynamic to one another. Again, done calmly, venting is a hell of a lot better than letting the emotions and issues get worse, or pile up, without trying to talk them out. After all, communication is one of the four pillars and both partners should be comfortable talking about anything to each other. Venting can be a positive thing when done properly. Don’t be afraid to tell the truth, make your feelings know. Holding it in will eat at you from the inside out and sooner or later explode from within. © 3/14/24 Ronald Dirienzo
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"communication is one of the four pillars and both partners should be comfortable talking about anything to each other." absolutely agree with this! requires bravery too.
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