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Friends815 62F
961 posts
8/3/2023 4:51 pm
Struggling…………



As I take
A strong hold
Of His hand
I’m also pulling
Away at times

I feel like I
Take two steps
Forward
Then three steps
Backward

At times I
Long to run toward
Him
And times I run
away

Hiding in my
Mental cage
Safe
From my vulnerability
And yet
Longing to give
All of me to Him

I had forgotten
The physicality is
Easy and fun
But the mental
Part of submission
Can be gutwrenching
At times

The opening of the layers
The surrendering of things
I long to hold onto
But He requires me to change
To His likes
Right down to the colors
Of my clothes
And how He wants things
Done

Slavery means surrendering
My mind, body, and soul
The war is with my ego
How much it took over
Those years I cared for another

It had too
Now, how do I get
Back to where I should be
Miss ya’ll! debra

Daddyslife 56M
57 posts
8/9/2023 6:28 pm

gorgeous


Friends815 62F
620 posts
8/8/2023 1:57 pm

    Quoting bdsmDOMdaddy:
    l understand how you feel the connection memory of your old DOM haunts you but you resist fight yet you gave yourself to another were you really ready?! are you really happy?! is he the one or are you pretending he is?! what’s holding you back?!
    you gotta let go to move on I wish you the best l hope it all works out for you girl!
Not pretending at all. Just hard surrendering to another. But He is kind and patient with me. Thank You my friend!


bdsmDOMdaddy 61M
4221 posts
8/8/2023 5:47 am

l understand how you feel the connection memory of your old DOM haunts you but you resist fight yet you gave yourself to another were you really ready?! are you really happy?! is he the one or are you pretending he is?! what’s holding you back?!
you gotta let go to move on I wish you the best l hope it all works out for you girl!


Friends815 62F
620 posts
8/7/2023 3:00 pm

    Quoting MissCherieO:
    Giving yourself to another it's hard but easy, I think you captured the struggle beautiful.
Thank you sweetie!


Friends815 62F
620 posts
8/7/2023 3:00 pm

    Quoting boh99:
    I hope you don't lose yourself, that would be a precious loss.
No, I'm not loosing myself sweetie. Just finding myself again. Developed many bad habits when I was my previous Owners Caregiver for 3 years. Though independently and made all the decisions. Thank you!


Friends815 62F
620 posts
8/7/2023 2:58 pm

    Quoting Tckg12:
    missed your blogs for awhile. as always they are very thought provoking. it's the inner conflict of how much do i want to or am willing to give up of myself.
    not easy when you are so attracted to your Master or Domme
Yes, transitioning from previous Ownership to New Master is very difficult. Have forgotten how intense it can be.


Friends815 62F
620 posts
8/7/2023 2:57 pm

    Quoting bdsmDOMdaddy:
    glad to read from you again girl hope all is well w you?!
    you seem to be resisting rebelling is iT intuition or obstenantness OR the connection you lost w another holding you back?!
The connection I lost with another. Everything has changed and I'm having to change with it. At times, I'm able. Other times, I struggle. He is very patient with me, however. Sometimes I just clam up. Can't speak. Still with Him though. And He with me. That's a good sign I know. Thank You Dear Friend.


bdsmDOMdaddy 61M
4221 posts
8/4/2023 7:46 am

glad to read from you again girl hope all is well w you?!
you seem to be resisting rebelling is iT intuition or obstenantness OR the connection you lost w another holding you back?!


Tckg12 69M
2544 posts
8/4/2023 2:46 am

missed your blogs for awhile. as always they are very thought provoking. it's the inner conflict of how much do i want to or am willing to give up of myself.
not easy when you are so attracted to your Master or Domme


boh99 68M
3169 posts
8/3/2023 11:10 pm

I hope you don't lose yourself, that would be a precious loss.


Friends815 62F
620 posts
8/3/2023 10:20 pm

    Quoting meltwill2:
    I enjoy reading your blog post.....keep it coming....
Thank you! I will.


Friends815 62F
620 posts
8/3/2023 10:19 pm

    Quoting MissCherieO:
    Giving yourself to another it's hard but easy, I think you captured the struggle beautiful.
It is hard! Thank you!


MissCherieO 53F

8/3/2023 6:47 pm

Giving yourself to another it's hard but easy, I think you captured the struggle beautiful.


meltwill2 72M
3827 posts
8/3/2023 6:22 pm

I enjoy reading your blog post.....keep it coming....


Friends815 62F
620 posts
8/3/2023 5:00 pm

Love to hear your thoughts.



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