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ProDomme, LifeStyler or Pretending (Time Wasting) I have lived the BDSM Lifestyle for over 20 years (on and off) and I still am amazed by the perception of those that contact Me through this platform as other platforms. My profile clearly states that I am an Independent, Experience ProDomme. I do not pretend, and I no longer Live a 24/7 BDSM Lifestyle (with gloria). I say this to say.... I Do Not understand why someone would contact Me and they are not interested in Real Time Rendezvous (RTR) or any other BDSM Service I Offer then fail to follow through and waste My Time. In My inbox I often have a message from a Master (Male-Domme) propositioning Me to switch. Then there are the males that are looking for a woman who wanting a no strings attached (one-night stands). Lastly, there are the Pretenders and Time wasters that seek cheap thrills (obtained through the messaging) that live too far to meet for a RealTime Rendezvous (RTR) As a ProDomme it gets frustrating because I already know what I want it seems that everyone else doesn’t know what they want and what it will take to satisfy that want. I did some research regarding the myth some tend to use as an excuse of why they prefer not to deal with a ProDomme. According to a post I read on www.reddit.com the writer stated the following information. Falling in love with your domme and the stigma of paying for sexual services: You should be under no illusions that any prodomme or would want to do these things with you were money not involved, but that doesn’t mean you have to dwell on the notion. You don’t have to look at it as paying for a service, I look at it as more of a gratuity – a giving of thanks for such rich bounty lol. However, if paying for these sorts of services is something that tends to bother you, my advice is to try and reframe it in your mind so you can enjoy yourself without those lingering bothersome thoughts. Also, there is that decisive moment I spoke about earlier, the moment where you realize there is no going back. That moment should wipe all other thoughts out of your mind leaving only the present and what is happening in that very moment. Paying money for sexual services can make some people feel bad. This very idea makes their self-worth plummet because they feel like the only way they can obtain what they desire is by paying someone who doesn’t care about them or who they are one way or another to do so. However, just because money is involved doesn’t mean there is no connection between provider and consumer. I look at the relationship between provider and consumer (outside the headspace of a session) to something akin to that of my relationship with the girl who cuts my hair. I know she likes me as a person and considers me to be her friend in the same way I consider them to be a friend for my part. But I wouldn’t ask her to cut my hair for free or try to convince myself she might be into me any more than I would do so with a ProDomme. That’s not to say that Dommes are not human beings with the same desires that everyone else has, it’s just that they make fantasies come to life for a living and part of their job is to make you feel amazing. The point is don’t misinterpret friendliness for being into you. Be honest and realistic with yourself before you convince yourself that romance between you and your Domme is on the table. Always remember, Sex Workers are people too: Treat them kindly with respect, they are people doing their job, please do your best to support their endeavors if you use their services (AllThingsBrown, 2023). So, I am conducting a poll to see how the BDSM Community (on this platform) feels about this dilemma.    Queen Ebony The QUEEN of Pain for Pleasure Step into The Queen's LAIR |
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