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Five Simple Words I recently had reason to research and reflect on the practical application of the BDSM lifestyle, specifically the D/S dynamic, within the context of a 24/7 relationship. As to be expected, and also a bit disappointing, the majority of articles I came across were primarily focused on the erotic and sexual aspects of BDSM as a form of leisure practice. I did however find one article that resonated with me -- the research "suggested that 24/7 BDSM is a socially constructed, consensual, full-time adherence to kink-related roles and behaviors untethered to time-limited scenes, woven into other life domains, and operating as an umbrella term to encompass other perpetual power dynamics" ("A Certain Evolution...", Cascalheira, Thomson, Wignall, 2021) I haven't read the article in its entirety yet, mostly because it's pretty late and I do need to get some sleep. But I will share that the phrase "woven into other life domains" resonates with me. That’s it - 5 very simple words. To the extent possible, and by mutual consent of course, a relationship for me would have D/s both as its foundation, and be woven into other life domains, integrated into all aspects of my life; not limited to a role I assume for a limited time only, such as a scene, or in the bedroom only, or when I return home at the end of a day. A simple, and straight-forward message -- "5 very simple words" -- to describe what I seek, with the "how" to be determined. The challenge is to find someone who sees it the same. tasina © December 2022 "like the seas, her depth and power will only be known by He who inspires her into submission” |
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The longer the internet has been a means to access kink, the more it gets focused on role play on line, and strictly sexual activity. That is in part created by the owners of these sites that feature nudes, sexual videos and such that is not so much relationship orientated. Heck this site for a time advertised that you could get laid in a guaranteed fashion. Thankfully they are not doing that, but the sex stuff has been overriding. I recently got interested in a woman and we chatted, but after about a week, she turned to talking sexual scenarios for the sake of her masturbation. She was a bit younger and frankly never had a serious long term relationship. Just serial sexual escapades. She is doomed to fail in relationships if she is focused on sex. "One Big Sky Covers Us All Equally"
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Thank you for sharing your comments and experience DancingDom. Disappointing to read about in some ways. What use to be a useful resource - a means of connecting with like-minded people - no longer exists. The internet use to expand our world, but now seems to make it smaller. It makes the search so much more difficult and challenging, perhaps almost futile in some respects. But then again I suppose the same could be said for those who are looking for any kind of relationship. Those on the fringe, looking for 24/7 may have it a little bit more of a challenge. "like the seas, her depth and power will only be known by He who inspires her into submission”
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The thing is, as difficult it is to connect with a compatible partner, one needs to keep an open mind to possibilities. Young just never know when a good candidate will show up. But of course stick to your standards and screen out the ones as fast as you can on those not worthy of your time. The bozos tend to reveal themselves fairly early on and of course watch for the red flags. "One Big Sky Covers Us All Equally"
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Thank you for your words of encouragement DancingDom. Seems I forgot about the red flags last week. Acting out of curiosity I got caught up in something but fortunately came to my senses. Think I’ll make those red flags glow-in-the-dark so they’re more visible. grin A pleasure to hear your views and wisdom as always. "like the seas, her depth and power will only be known by He who inspires her into submission”
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good princess divine
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