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transvestite I am a transvestite. A cross dresser. I am a person who derives pleasure from dressing in clothes primarily associated with the opposite sex.  I never EVER thought I would be admitting something like that, and not because I was raised to think it was wrong, or because society hasn’t been quick to accept that sort of thing. It’s just that I never found the notion particularly arousing. I detailed a bit in a previous post the few times I’ve worn women’s clothing, and as before still find myself in awe of this new interest and awakening of sorts. There have never been any sexual or kinky interests of mine that have seemed too taboo or embarrassing that I wouldn’t explore them, given the chance. That is one of the reasons my knowledge and experience is so diverse I guess; sex in most of its forms either arouses or fascinates me, but very little of it repulses me. Men who wear women’s clothing, are in good shape, slightly feminine and mostly lacking in<b> body hair </font></b>are actually attractive to me but I never saw a sexy tranny and thought how I would like emulate, or anything of that nature. My head and cock were always at the other end of the spectrum, eyeing that asshole above those testicles and wondering how deep it was. And even now, when I’m wearing a dress and posing with my ass stuck up in the air, I’m still in that mindset. The irony, of course, is that the lust I am feeling is generally for the sexy beast posing in the mirror on the other side of the room, and that beast is me. I have a hot ass. I would totally fuck it. I don’t want to get off the subject, but I have to admit real quick that I have more than once masturbated to video and pictures of my own derriere recently. Sitting there, cock in hand, I’ve basically fantasized about fucking myself. It’s gotten that weird but liberating.  Seriously, if I didn’t think I looked hot as fuck in some of these outfits I wouldn’t get off on wearing the clothing. If I am not looking in the mirror, but still have a pair of panties on, my cock doesn’t remain rock hard. Sure they feel good, as do the dresses and bodysuits, but without the visual to remind me of what I look like it all becomes “familiar” very quickly. I’m not the guy that goes to work wearing stockings and a garter belt, and gets off on it the entire day. My arousal and excitement would only come when I ducked into the bathroom and was able to take a look at myself in the mirror. It’s not the secrecy of the act, it’s the visual aspect of how passable I appear, that turns me on.  There have been a couple of outfits that fit so snugly, in just the right places, that I could envision going out in public wearing them and still feeling a hint of arousal. Once or twice I have thought about what it might be like to go to a swinger’s club dressed up (not passable, but looking delicious from knee to chest) just to see if I would get attention and receive a good ego stroke, and that might still happen. The lovely lady I live with would be more than happy to accompany me, I am certain of that. I think the true test of whether or not I am fully into this transvestite label will be the times when I do not need to wear women’s clothing for the purpose of filming, but decide to anyways. Will the act of putting on a pair of panties make me grow hard like the process of putting on a cockring still does, even though I’ve been wearing one off-and-on for over a decade? Or will I only begin to get stiff when I can look in the mirror and see if I’m still sexy as fuck in a g-string? I can only say that right now, reasons aside, I am thoroughly enamored with cross dressing but will keep it almost solely professional for the moment. |
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