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Want? Or have to offer? Great! Those men..... Who all WANT A submissive woman.... The strangest thing about it, they are not at all specific, at all A SUBMISSIVE... Well, that might be something to overcome, once you get into conversation with that person? Maybe.... Or not... The strangest thing is, i find, they NEVER, EVER, talk about what they have to OFFER, to that said submissive woman. Also, they never talk about any personal preference… No hard limits, nothing about their long term goals... Nothing about the NEED to be compatible, have consensual agreed upon goals... Nothing about what they as a Person, have to offer. Nothing about their life, their work, their family, friends, his history, nothing! Their mental state of being, They never ever give you the feeling, that they are INTO you. There is no sincere, genuine interest in the person. That they want to show you how reliable they are, how emotional sane they are, that they have their shit together - as they call it, on FETLIFE. That they really have something to offer you, More then their sexorgan and/ or his tools/ porn fantasy. As a human being, a man! Nothing about what they expect of A submissive woman N O T H I N G. nothing. Strange isnit? A one size fits all kind of submissive hive mind? Also, once you get into a conversation with this specific kind of "d"... All they do, is claim; you must do this, must do that, must be into all and everything they are into. They never ask you about your preferences, at all. You? As a person? Yeah! A shock! i know! A SUB IS A PERSON????? GET OUT OF HERE! The submissive women does not have any personal preference, at all. Those men are mostly not even capeble to have an equal conversation with. When you want to talk about your idea about having a D/s or M/s or TAT, they dont like that at all. They call you bratty, or mouthy….. Or, their biggest compliment: They call you A domina! All those wants, and have nothing to offer? Strange kind of "dominants"..... All wanting but have nothing to offer you? Strange kind of a D/s that will be...…. Red flag, it is. |
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The other day i was in an conversation with such kind of "d", i thought it was really strange, that he did nothing to make me feel comfortabel in the conversation with him. Just demanding! From the first sentence. Offcourse i thanked him for his kind of "dominance".
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What a putz he must have been. He evidentally doesn't understand that submission is gained thought trust. At least in my eyes that's the case.
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12/16/2019 1:55 pm |
God, what a load of crap !! Of course it is always the mans fault, you are obviously perfect and no one is good enough
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I think you have identified the difference between someone who "wants" and a true Dom who both has a need to fulfill both his and his subs needs. You have to set boundaries to start off until that element of trust is properly established. Then you can move forward as a D/s couple and explore mutual areas of interest. Never understood people who expect to be given carte blanche from the get go.
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rosa I suspect most of them are just fantasising and wanking but have NO real clue what the Life-Style is about  A life spent making mistakes is not only more honorable, but more useful than a life spent doing nothing. George Bernard Shaw Jenny
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So hot and beautiful
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gopats1, he was indeed, only did he not know that! He thought he was a match made in heaven, LMAO!
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Bumtingler, Aah, such wise, beautifil words! Thank you.
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jenny, A-men to that! 
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Cumgunn331, Who? You or me? Thank you for your comment. _||_
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It's kind of funny in a way how the terms submissive and dominant take on a life of their own. Is someone dominant because they enjoy washing their mates hair or cooking a fine dinner? Is someone submissive because they enjoy being on the receiving end of such attentions? The one point which seems to get lost in conversations such as these is the concept of expectations of both parties. I've been called a fake more then once because I've enjoyed doing the labor the build a relationship and not a wam, bam, scene. In my mind, a wam, bam scene may be fun, but it is hardly a basis for a growing relationship between two people. . A while back, I came across some writings of a woman who defended her choice the be a submissive and a feminist. Her points supported the view if this is what I want, why can't I work for it without someone judging me by a narrow perspective of his or her expectations. This is where we as individuals need to allows others to be who they are. If we mesh, great. If we don't, nice to meet you and to get to know you a little. Enjoy your life.
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It is mostly about what those 2 people have agreed upon. Talked about, negotiated about, to find if they are compatible at all, on all levels, be it hair washing, or cooking a fine dinner, and all in between, and having their emotional and SM needs met A Dominant on Fetlife said this about it; She takes care of me, and i take care of us. That example about being submissive ánd a feminist, is mostly because a lot of men have all kind of misconceptions & fears about whát being a feminist really is about. Thank you for your wise words.
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