Sigh
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Posted:Sep 23, 2017 12:02 pm
Last Updated:May 25, 2024 6:57 am 45441 Views
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Sometimes it doesn't matter how much someone tries, sometimes it doesn't matter how much someone reassures another person, sometimes it doesn't matter how much someone knows another person, sometimes it doesn't matter how well someone knows another person's demons they will still hold dominance over everything that person does.
Habits are hard to break, they take hold of a person by providing something that they are lacking in moments when negativity or positivity would suffice, smoking, drinking, isolating, eating, cutting, crying, shopping, running, the list of coping mechanisms is as long as the list of things humans try to escape from, there's no inbetween and there's no way to help someone break theirs if they find comfort and safety within the confines of their own personal habit.
Understanding the sadness, understanding the frustration, understanding the shame, the defeat, the hatred, the self loathing, the pounding heart which wants to change, the speeding brain that runs after a kindred spirit, the quiet roar of a larynx so used to silence that it can't express itself any longer and the bursting lungs readying to scream, they know all of them yet they are never enough.
Understanding another person will only go so far to helping a relationship, someone can understand very single thing about another person but it's up to them if they let them in, the majority will let someone else into their life knowing that they could hurt them but choose to trust in them, choose to trust that the bond shared is deeper than habitual happenstance and understanding someone else's demons goes a long way to avoiding misunderstanding, but only when someone let's another in.
Being shut out, being ignored, being shunned, being blocked, being the last one to know anything is the price that some people pay for being able to see, identify, explain and understand another person's demons - It doesn't matter that they know why they behave the way they do, it doesn't matter that they know how to prevent the demons from rising up, it doesn't matter that they know enough to explain their behaviour that they themselves don't understand, it doesn't matter and neither do they.
Soon the one person who provided a comforting and soothing perspective in a sea of darkness and danger becomes no one - No longer do their comforting embraces mean something, no longer do their understanding words reach wanting ears, no longer do their smiles invite warmth and no longer do their efforts mean something.
Reduced to nothing more than another contact, another name known, another face recognised and another person held at arms length, another person to keep away, another person degraded by a habit which won't go away.
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Blade
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Posted:Sep 17, 2017 12:08 pm
Last Updated:Sep 17, 2017 12:08 pm 43347 Views
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When everything appears to mean something utterly different than what was presumed it's difficult for people to see what really matters in life, the ups, the downs, the swigs and the roundabouts become a daily chore of navigation without way points to help assess position.
Words cut through people quicker than any blade can, while metal or obsidian or glass, crystal, wood or card blades have the ability to slice, stab and tend flesh they do so through design rather than intent - blades are created for the pure purpose of separating flesh from bone or muscle, they are offense, they are defense, they are tools with which humans have armed themselves with for millennia to settle disputes which have someone's lasted just as long and they have been adapted through the ages for the soul purpose of damaging another humans body.
A sack of flesh held upright by sticks of calcium, held together by clusters of protein connected via strings of sinew, an animal by design, a human by default, an easy target for predators from all aspects of the animal kingdom and no where near as evolved as they believe themselves to be - Swimming without fins, flying without wings, snarling without teeth and killing without need, that's the human identity, a cruel creature no better designed than any other but graced with the ability to understand itself and place itself within the wider context of universal life.
An arrogant creature driven by ignorance, jealously and fear, nothing better than a constantly caged animal wishing for release yet having no idea what that actually means for its life.
As much as a blade dulls through repeated use, the human psyche does the same thing, soon enough it'll reach a breaking point and when they happens blades which were forged for millennia turn into saviours of a righteously blind mind, striking out wherever and whenever it can, nothing other rush contempt for fellow man, nothing more than disinterest for those weaker and absolute justification through denouncing of logic seeking absolution through rhetoric.
Soon enough this sack of flesh is rendered down into component parts, the sensation of a broken psyche coming to realize it's chosen fate is to lay among the other scrap parts awaiting reform and reuse, hoping for a resurgence of life and meaning, realistically there's nothing for a broken blade to accomplish - It has served its purpose and even if it was to join other component parts in being reworked into a new blade it would still never be what it once was, never whole, never straight or true, never the power that it once was and never the personification of evolution that it could have been.
Dejected, fractured, forgotten and in pieces it's no wonder than functionality ceases after a prolonged period of time when it's only purpose is to battle against its own kind.
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Ace High
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Posted:Sep 11, 2017 12:24 pm
Last Updated:May 25, 2024 6:57 am 39520 Views
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Words have a lot of meaning for human beings, they hold entire lives accountable for mere words, emphasis and value is put upon what words are applied to a human, what words describe that human and ultimately a human is defined by other humans words.
The weight of words lays heavy on the hearts of human beings who try to spend their time not doing the same to others, not saying things which would instil fear or sadness or even love, knowing the power that these emotions have over the actions of humans these people know that using them could easily result in another downfall - Believing that words have the capability to destroy someone is a sensible mentality to have considering everything revolves around language and how words are used for power, knowing that logic will always lose when pitted against pride or power and realising that there is no way to fight it.
Most of the time people have to deal with limited knowledge of another human being despite how well they get along or how many things they have in common, through words there's the ability to resonate with another human on a very private and personal scale, that two lives can entwine and become one so easily is a piece of knowledge that destroys most because it shows the danger that lies with intimacy.
Actions often speak louder than any words ever could, no matter how much someone may say something, their actions are what betrays the intent behind those words and when witnessing an action that doesn't match known words of intent there becomes a discourse in lies.
Fabrications, picturesque half truths to paint the masterpiece that someone wants when their linguistic capabilities are shining through, however when with each other if one half is glued to something the other half isn't the yawning casm slowly starts to get wider and wider until the grand canyon lays between two people who physically are mere inches apart.
If someone is too busy, too distracted or too ignorant to observe and be in the moment with the person they're with then there becomes a real hollow sensation inside the other, instead of merely cuddling, one person is flipping, is typing, is texting, is using their time to placate the body next to them while they themselves place their bets.
The space between two people with similar intentions, similar likes and prevailing code of conduct is a vast expanse of reality that shows the pathway to each others core, their values in the small moments in life are what should define them, times where their attention isn't being taken and can wander freely towards whatever calls for it, that is where judgement upon human beings can be cast.
If someone is too busy to give a final kiss goodbye, that person is passing the time, not investing it.
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Shelf
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Posted:Sep 5, 2017 1:01 pm
Last Updated:Nov 5, 2017 9:42 am 42869 Views
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When someone stops being there for another person it's difficult to retain the same relationship once had, when talking daily becomes a chore, when one person goes out of their way to instigate conversation and is met with monosyllabic responses there becomes a limit to how much they can take.
Not being there for someone in the way previously promised it becomes redundant to promise anything else, once someone's word has been broken once there isn't any point in believing them when they swear against themselves again, it becomes just an exercise in futility as the let down drags the other person down deeper and deeper until they dive head first into apathy - Once this apathetic attitude arrives then any other emotional investment is dead, promises made just become flowery words with no meaning behind them whatsoever, they have no impact any more, the same as apologising repeatedly reduces apologies to nothing more than verbal dust.
The longing is the part that kills the most.
Longing for the way things were is a common expression of emotions for human beings, a schedule of familiarity even with emotions is something the majority of human beings wish to have, a predictable measurement of how their relationships function but when this isn't easily available the longing starts and it eats away at the core of a person.
Hours go by feeling like days, days feel like weeks, weeks like months until time relation becomes redundant and someone who used to be part of every single day becomes a memory, something in the past, something that has no relevance in shaping how life will be but all relevance in how life won't be - However the relationship ended will become a template for avoidance, a warning sign of things to keep in mind, a way to measure and classify other people's behavior in order to prevent the same pain a second time around.
Feeling like an option to someone is a strange limbo like situation, knowing that previously there was no way this would happen, but finding oneself reduced to nothing more than an item on a shelf to be picked up and played with at leisure creates a sense of resentment and before soon even that shelf starts to collect dust, inches thick as the apathy steals away any and all involvement.
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Fibre
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Posted:Aug 30, 2017 12:31 pm
Last Updated:May 25, 2024 6:57 am 38726 Views
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Insoluble.
A binding agent to allow nutrients, minerals and vitamins to be transported to the lower GI tract while retaining entire GI synergy.
A simple thing indeed, nothing fancy, nothing expensive, nothing out of this world or even extraordinary in its ability to right the wrongs of one too many indulgent moments in life, a staple dietary need that functions perfectly with little help from outside sources.
Dilution is the bane of existence foe many things in the emotional world, a feeling on Monday may be gone by Tuesday, a loving someone one month may be gone by the next, hating something for years may turn to apathy slowly and gradually with very little input from other areas of the human mind - Everything, thoughts, feelings, ideas, emotions, get chewed up, swallowed and sent on its way through the human body as if they were the same as food stuffs but what they can't be is digested, they can't be broken down and absorbed as if their structure were pliable.
Certain things will stick in the back of the throat for days, months or even years as the person stuck with them tries, usually in vain, to swallow them down and process what they mean, unfortunately there emotions are too solid, too grating and far too hard to gain leverage upon.
Love and hate stick around human beings as if they were nitrogen and oxygen providing them with the sustenance necessary for living, a high price is put on both emotions.
For the hatred, Wars start, lives are lost, countries destroyed, religions declassified, entire nations vanish within the blink of an eye because of someone's hatred, one person's innate dislike of an entity can change the entire surface of the world with very little influence and the bright side is that no matter what, that that will always be a constant.
For the love, Wars are stopped, lives are started, countries unite, religions are born, nations are created from a deep mutual understanding on behalf of everyone that whatever entirety or aspect of life that unites them is worth living under as a rule of law, it is the light to balance the dark and it is as constant as its raven hatred sibling.
Nothing can make these two emotions easier on the palate for a species that is best suited to mild conditions, mild emotions or mild sensibilities, with constitutions so sparsely defended it's little wonder that half the planet has killed half the planet over and over again for nothing more than boundary lines on geographic topography - Jealously, revenge, gluttony or even shame run rampant when these two emotions are all people can think about, when these two emotions are all people are fed daily it's little wonder that they can do anything else other than slowly kill themselves and everyone around them.
Life will always find a way to influence, to steer and to guide these mammalian species, yet human beings will constantly do their utmost to ignore the basics in their lives, they will fight to swallow what they can't and they will choke on those that they can, their pride their biggest downfall.
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