**ON THE SIXTH DAY… **
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Posted:Apr 6, 2023 2:03 am
Last Updated:Apr 8, 2023 4:02 am 9287 Views
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God Creating Spiders
God: Make it have 8 legs
Angel: Seems excessive but OK
God: And 8 eyes
Angel: You need to calm down a li-
God: Give it a bum rope
God Creating Kittens
God: make them fluffy & adorable like little furry hugs
Angel: that’s so swee….
God: And put razor blades on their feet
God Creating Mosquitos
God: I wonder how I could get everyone to spray chemicals on themselves and also slap their own faces…
God Creating Bees
God: Put a needle on its bum
Angel: Come on God, what –
God: Make it’s puke delicious
Angel: What the hell!!!
God Creating Praying Mantis
God: Make an insect that does karate
Angel: Okay…
God: Now make it bite her husband’s head off
Angel: Dude, we need to talk
God Creating Dogs
God: Oh these turned out great. I’m going to want all of these back at some point
God Creating Pandas
God: Cow bears
Angel: What?
God: Did I stutter?
Angel: ??
God: Take a cow and make it a bear
God Creating Snakes
God: How about a sock that’s angry all the time
God Creating Alligators
God: See that log?
Angel: Yeah?
God: Fill it with teeth
Angel: Say again?
God: FILL IT!
God Creating Jellyfish
God: How about an evil bag?
God Creating Parrots
God: How about like a tie Dye Chicken who screams actual words at you?
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6
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Sunrise
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Posted:Apr 5, 2023 3:15 am
Last Updated:Apr 29, 2023 5:56 am 9129 Views
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“For a girl with such a dark mind, you're a little too in love with the sunrise.”
― Sherry Namdeo
~Photo Taken By: Me
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11
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Care To Play 20 Questions?
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Posted:Apr 4, 2023 4:02 am
Last Updated:Apr 4, 2023 6:04 pm 8484 Views
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Most people have played the fun game of twenty questions before but sometimes it seems to me that people in the D/S lifestyle can jump into a relationship without really understanding what that amazing potential partner wants or expects. I believe we all know what that then leads to, discomfort, and possible dissolution of a new relationship. So I thought of twenty questions that I feel should be asked rather than just assumed.
1. Are you single? This is a no-brainer right but it is amazing how many people just make this assumption only to find out that Mr. or Ms. Wonderful is otherwise in a relationship.
2. What style of relationship are you seeking, monogamous, poly, or open? Once again, many people make assumptions only to be blindsided down the yellow-brick relationship road when their new partner discusses poly or adding someone to the mix or is against doing this. Rather than be caught off guard, this is a must-ask.
3. Definitions are important, so make sure to ask what does dominant or submissive means to you. Within the lifestyle, so many people have different ideas of what these basic terms mean, this is also a must-ask. People are quick to color a potential partner with their definitions and it is vital to understand how the other person defines lifestyle roles.
4. How long ago was your last lifestyle relationship? This is important because there could be red flags if the person is just out of a partnership. If they are, then it means determining if you feel they are relationship-ready or if you might be just the ‘rebound’ date(s).
5. Have they had a lifestyle partnership before? The person you are interested in may well claim to have been around the lifestyle for a good amount of time but it is also important to know if in that time they have experienced a relationship with the lifestyle being a part of it.
6. What do you enjoy about the lifestyle? I feel that this is important because if a person is looking for more than just play, they talk about some of the non-play parts of the lifestyle. For example, a d-type may discuss how special it is to see a submissive grow or an s-type could share they love not having to make every decision. Play might well be part of this but it can be a great way to see through someone who wants to play rather than engage in something deeper than a playship.
7. When it comes to lifestyle play, what are your must-haves? This is important, using myself as an example, I do not enjoy rope bondage at all. It is beautiful to look at when others do it but if that was something that was a must or something a potential partner enjoys, odds are, things are not going to mesh when it comes time to ‘enjoy’.
8. Safewords are critical, so please ask what are your safewords, and whether have you ever used them/had them used. Yes, I believe a d-type should have them so they could immediately stop play if it needed to stop now rather than have time lost because the submissive thought they were just ‘playing’. Submissives, if a dominant is dismissive towards safewords in any way, shape, or form, do not pass go, do not collect two hundred dollars, and never go on a date with them.
9. Ask how open are you about the lifestyle? Imagine meeting someone amazing but discovering they are completely open about the lifestyle, meaning everyone in their life knows they love them some BDSM but perhaps you are more careful with who knows your lifestyle choices. Understanding another’s openness or lack of it is very important because it can cause riffs or worse later.
10. Everyone has made horrific mistakes in past relationships, so I suggest asking, what was the worst mistake you have made as a dominant or submissive? Unless the person is new to the lifestyle, they will have a mistake to share or if they are newer, craft the question to just vanilla dating.
I am now going to suggest some very vanilla questions but I want to suggest these because it can be very easy to get caught up in lifestyle questions and forget your potential relationship will have to function in the vanilla world as well.
11. Are you looking for a forever relationship or something shorter? Very often people are surprised when they discover a person they are dating is not looking for the same end goal as they are. Ask about this upfront because if they are looking for happily ever after and you are seeking happiness but not long term, there will be issues.
12. Would you be willing to move or would you want me to relocate? Many people here, find themselves in long-distance relationships but have never really put thought into the ‘end game’ of actually living together. Discover this up front and know if you are in a place to relocate or if would you require your suitor to rent the moving van. Sadly, you may find someone completely amazing but find that relocating is not an option on both ends which would leave the relationship stranded in video dating hell forever. So make sure you discover this before your dominant or submissive is just an image on your electronic device.
13. What are your goals in life? It is important that dreams and desires mesh.
14. What about those meddling ? No, I am not suggesting a Scooby Do marathon for date night but if you have , want them/more of them, or are not someone who wants them, talk about it. In today’s world with co-parenting, single parenting, wanting to be a parent, or being determined to not be a parent discussing and how they fit into a potential future is an important discussion.
15. How much alone time do they need? Some people, need alone time to recharge and others recharge by being with their partner. Discover a prospect's alone time needs before there is a brouhaha because one side feels smothered and the other cannot understand why they do not want to always be with them.
The last five are indeed what I would no-brainers but I am including them here because so often in the lifestyle people get lost in the world of spanking, floggers, and kinky fuckery while forgetting relationships happen in real life. There is a ton more than just these five questions but I am adding them here to be a reminder of this.
16. What do you do for a living? 17. What are your hobbies? 18. Share three activities you look forward to sharing with a future partner? 19. Tell me about your family? 20. What is your go-to type of music or artist?
I know this list is not a definitive guide to questions to ask in the amazing world of lifestyle dating but in my time involved in the lifestyle rodeo, sometimes it seems that people’s brains short-circuit when they meet someone truly amazing. While it is awesome to have had the honor to get to know someone like that, it takes more than amazing to make a real-world relationship work. So I hope these questions will help be a circuit breaker next time Ms. or Mr. Wonderful appears on a person’s dating radar.
©TLK2020
**Archive
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3
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Safewords.
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Posted:Apr 3, 2023 4:43 am
Last Updated:Apr 3, 2023 9:43 pm 8471 Views
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• Safewords should be determined during negotiations, clothed, before any play takes place.
• They should be something clear and concise, something easy to remember.
• Basic and generally accepted safewords are RED, MERCY, and SAFE.
• Begging is not a safeword, stop is not a safeword.
• There are such things as non-verbal safewords: a drop, finger snap, or hand gesture.
• Remember to check in: Are you with Me? Do you remember your safeword?
• Use the finger spread method to let your Top know how much distress you’re in: the wider the fingers are spread the more intense the pain is.
~mysadisticdesires
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9
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The Perfect Submissive
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Posted:Mar 31, 2023 3:12 am
Last Updated:Mar 31, 2023 9:12 pm 8594 Views
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My early beliefs about D/s were shaped by a series of pretty emotionally abusive relationships. And by shit, I read in the weird crevices of the internet. For a long time, I didn’t know any better.
Pair that with the fact that I’m a perfectionist and you got some pretty dicey situations. And I’m not talking oh, I like to do well - I’m talking about a nearly pathological need to be perfect.
I used to think the perfect sub would take whatever they were given and beg for more. I used to think the perfect sub would never have to use their safeword. I used to think the perfect sub was always willing, ready, and available.
I used to think the perfect sub didn’t have limits. Or that if they did then they’d happily push and test and abandon those limits to please their Dom(me).
I used to think the perfect sub didn’t make waves, didn’t ask for too much, and didn’t need more than what they were given.
I used to think the perfect sub was focused entirely on the relationship and on pleasing their Dom(me) and that nothing was ever - EVER - more important than that.
I used to think the perfect sub was pleasing, quiet, agreeable, soft, and pliant. Always. Without exception.
But now I know better.
The perfect sub has limits and safewords when it gets to be too much. The perfect sub is not afraid to safeword whenever and whoever they need to.
The perfect sub has needs and speaks up about those needs because they know that their Dom(me) is not a mind reader.
The perfect sub has expectations and requirements and beliefs that they bring to the relationship. The perfect sub has deal-breakers and things that will not be negotiated.
The perfect sub is not always ready, not always willing, and not always available - and that’s okay.
The perfect sub has a life and focuses outside of the relationship. The perfect sub has interests and hobbies and friends and a life. And sometimes that life requires attention.
The perfect sub doesn’t necessarily like everything that’s depicted in porn. The perfect sub can’t necessarily deepthroat or take a spanking or be tied up in elaborate positions.
The perfect sub knows that communication is key. And knows that it’s okay to stand up for themselves. And knows that their Dom(me) is not a god but a human.
And the perfect sub is human too. Which means that they’re not really perfect at all.
And that’s okay.
I’m learning.
~DirtyLittleBookworm
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10
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The Ache
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Posted:Mar 30, 2023 1:48 am
Last Updated:Apr 8, 2023 7:34 am 8125 Views
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Sometimes, when one is without a partner, there comes a wave of loneliness… not the garden variety sort, but the cellular level, bone-deep, aching to your TEETH kind of lonely that spawns a thirst unquenchable, and an ache beyond description. It feels like drowning.
I miss having coffee ready for my partner before he went to work in the morning. Just the act of grinding the beans, for example… such a simple thing, and not, on the surface, romantic. But it was. It was knowing that he would start each day with the knowledge, and the feeling, of being cared for, of MATTERING… a small, seemingly utilitarian thing that I did for him, but not small at all when you think about the heart in it.
I miss doing dishes and yelling, “HEY, HONEY?” It doesn’t matter what I was calling to him for, it was the comforting everydayness of it, the (verbally) reaching out, and knowing the one I loved was… there.
I miss having someone to share bites off my plate with at restaurants. Or at home (though obviously not the same at home). That simple, smiling, sometimes a playful bit of intimacy, feeding him a bite (or vice versa) and feeling the pleasure when his eyes would close for a second and he’d just go ‘Mmmmmm….’
I miss being held. Not sexually wanted (male or female, we can all find someone to want us sexually, if we really want to), but EMOTIONALLY needed/supported. That quiet moment of deep-breath peace when you lean into one another and just wallow in the feel of arms around you, warm breath sifting through your hair as you tuck your head under his chin or against his neck. Or the way he would pull me into his lap when I just needed to cry. Not the delicate little 'oh, tears are leaking out a bit’ cry, but the -like wracking sobs of pent-up pain. And it was okay… I could cry, and I wasn’t alone.
When I think of being lonely, it isn’t often about sex. Sure, I’m a very sexual creature. Kind of a given. But when the waves of lonely crash down on me, it’s the things most people don’t consider that are things that often hit me hardest with their absence. I want to whisper and giggle with a partner while watching a movie at the theater. I want to teasingly bicker, while roaming Bed, Bath, and Beyond, over what color of towels we want in the bathroom. I want to make him his coffee, and maybe he washes my car for me now and then. I want to slide him the last scallop, that I know he REALLY wants but won’t say so, off the appetizer plate at 801 Chophouse. I want to hang Christmas lights and blow shit up together on the 4th of July.
I want someone to feel better knowing I have their back… and to breathe easier knowing they have mine.
Lonely is hard.
~thegirlinthewoman
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Something Powerful
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Posted:Mar 28, 2023 3:36 am
Last Updated:Mar 30, 2023 2:02 am 9049 Views
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When a woman strips herself bare of not only the clothes that cover her body but also the shackles of a lifetime of conditioning and insecurities, finds the strength to kneel before another and ask to be taken, it is truly the most powerful moment in a BDSM relationship. Oh, there are many, many other powerful moments and experiences, and I routinely feel a sense of awe and gratitude as she continues to find new ways to display her submission and desire to learn and grow. But none for me can compare to the power, majesty, humility, and grace that I feel when the right woman holds out her trembling hand and heart and asks to be taken.
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11
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Just Sex?
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Posted:Mar 27, 2023 3:43 am
Last Updated:Jun 9, 2023 8:20 pm 8153 Views
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It was never just sex. Even the fastest, dirtiest, most impersonal screw was about more than sex. It was about connection. It was about looking at another human being and seeing your own loneliness and neediness reflected back. It was recognizing that together you had the power to temporarily banish that sense of isolation. It was about experiencing what it was to be human at the basest, most instinctive level. How could that be described as just anything?
~simplymarge
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13
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Pink Floyd’s ‘The Dark Side of the Moon’ Turns 50 | Album Anniversary
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Posted:Mar 26, 2023 3:20 am
Last Updated:May 24, 2023 7:58 pm 10359 Views
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Before You get into this great article I wanted to tell you about my own experience with DSOTM. It was the first vinyl album I ever purchased. I was fifteen at the time. I played it to death. My dad had an awesome sound system and one day I came home after school put on the album and turn the volume up to eleven. The record started, and "Speak To Me" started to play. It took about sixty seconds to blow out my dad's humungous speakers. He was furious when he got home and I was banned from using the stereo. He went out and bought new speakers. When he came in with them he handed me a pair of headphones. I was in love from that point on. This is an amazing album. If you've never heard it. Listen to it. You'll find the entire thing on YT.
Eclipse
All that you touch
And all that you see
All that you taste
All you feel
And all that you love
And all that you hate
All you distrust
All you save
And all that you give
And all that you deal
And all that you buy
Beg, borrow or steal
And all you create
And all you destroy
And all that you do
And all that you say
And all that you eat
And everyone you meet (everyone you meet)
And all that you slight
And everyone you fight
And all that is now
And all that is gone
And all that's to come
And everything under the sun is in tune
But the sun is eclipsed by the moon
Lately, I’ve been thinking about chaos. More specifically, I’ve been thinking about the vast interiority of a person, and how it’s impossible to fully map the terrain of oneself. Relationships and interactions are collisions of people in progress, and fully knowing another person, let alone the world at large, is an impossible order.
Or, as Tolstoy put it, “A sudden, vivid awareness of the terrible opposition between something infinitely great and indefinable that was in him and something narrow and fleshy that he himself…was.”
This thing is infinitely great and indefinable—hard to articulate—but there is a pretty good representation of it, and it’s The Dark Side of the Moon.
Enough of this record’s legend has circulated in popular culture in the last fifty years, so if you’re looking for another piece on its influence on rock history, this isn’t that. It’s obviously an enormous aesthetic and technological achievement, a band at the height of their powers wielding the full weight of their medium. But the legend of Dark Side of the Moon is, in my experience, a detriment to getting to its core.
I first came to the record at age fifteen, more than thirty years after it was established as a visionary moment in the history of rock music (and t-shirt design). Indeed, in those early days, it was impossible to process Dark Side without thinking about it as an achievement. My favorite moment on the record was the final couplet, with the lyric “but the sun is eclipsed by the moon,” which to me represented the power of the album to overshadow everything in the rock music landscape. It was a celebration of itself, a victory lap, acknowledgment of a monumental artistic achievement. A moment of certainty and definition.
During a sleepless night a few weeks ago, I put the record on for the first of many listens in explicit preparation for this article. I knew I had a lot to look forward to, like Clare Torry’s cathartic vocal solo on “The Great Gig in the Sky” (still a highlight) and the genius contrast between hard rock and sensitivity on “Time.”
But the tune that got me this time around was “On the Run,” an instrumental that I used to think of as a few minutes of nothing between the album’s overture and its unprecedented middle suite of “Time,” “The Great Gig in the Sky,” and “Money.” On this listen, the literal breathlessness of “On the Run,” the footsteps, and the Doppler-like sound of the synthesizer, produced a feeling of complete disorientation. The anxiety of this instrumental communicated to me more clearly than any of the album’s lyrics did. I realized that this was the sound of the thing I had been feeling: of searching for a way to connect to oneself and, by extension, other people, but having a hard time doing so because of the fundamental disorientations of life.
“On the Run” had never felt like a part of the album’s legend. Maybe at that time, I hadn’t been through enough for it to resonate with me. The more in-your-face lyrical tracks seemed like the essence of the message, but they were also the ones that I heard on the radio and knew as defining Pink Floyd cuts. Before Dark Side of the Moon became what it was, this record was an earnest attempt to capture that elusive feeling that I still can’t name; “On the Run” was just as integral to that story as “Time” and “Eclipse.”
I should note here that “On the Run” is not exactly a subtle piece of music. The footsteps and whirring synthesizer, along with the airline announcements, make it clear that this is supposed to be an anxiety-producing piece. But through the way that the album circulated in the popular discourse, I just assumed that it was filler that didn’t add as much to the narrative as the rest of the work. But when you think of it as the center of the album, everything else begins to make a lot more sense.
The paralyzed uncertainty of “On the Run” makes the other tracks stronger. For example, it supplements “Money” by adding a referent to the instrumental interlude “Money.” As with “On the Run,” David Gilmour’s guitar work in the bridge of “Money” is intentionally disorienting, avoiding the melodic approach that makes up his signature sound. By the time you get to the end of the second guitar solo and crash back into the verse, a few things happen at once.
First, the instrumental section is in 4/4, a more traditional time signature for rock music. But the verses are in 7/4, which sounds a little off to most listeners. But because 7/4 was established earlier in the song, and 4/4 is rendered so incomprehensible by the instrumental break, 7/4 actually feels like a relief. The “normal” state of things (the part in 4/4) is humanity at its most confused and disoriented. We did something unnatural (regulated the world through commerce and greed) to wrangle that feeling of uncertainty—we opted for 7/4. Because we can’t process the mania of the guitar solo, which produces the same anxieties in us that “On the Run” does and encompasses the huge unknowability of humanity, we turn to something unnatural like Money that makes things seem normal.
Before I saw “On the Run” in this way, I thought of “Money” as an outlier on Dark Side of the Moon, a heavy-handed and predictable capitalism critique that didn’t get into the themes of madness and death that defines the record. But by focusing on the part of the record that I so often overlooked when I was focusing on its legend, I was able to see so much more in the legendary moments.
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