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OUCHIE!!!!
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Posted:Nov 6, 2023 7:46 pm
Last Updated:Apr 28, 2024 11:09 am 9985 Views
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While playing mechanic to get my transfer case fixed i did a booboo. So, booboo fixed and nothing too major. Next weekend trying it again! Was told im too stubborn. Told them thankies for the compliment! This is gonna get done!
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Playing what?!
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Posted:Oct 20, 2023 11:06 pm
Last Updated:Oct 23, 2023 10:53 pm 16809 Views
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I played mechanic today! Replaced all my rotors and brakes except for one rotor. One freaking bolt beat my butt. Will wind up taking my truck to a shop to get that one blasted bolt removed in order to replace that darn rotor. Pretty proud of myself. First time for everything.
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more mind wanderings
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Posted:Oct 17, 2023 11:29 pm
Last Updated:May 23, 2024 8:27 am 12575 Views
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This damned brain
This damned brain wont stop This body needs sleep The pieces of the soul you ripped apart need to settle The spirit you destroyed is no more The hope that started to grow is now dead The numbness only stops for the tears that fall The hate that grows isn't for you my love It's for myself
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What a curisoity!
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Posted:Oct 15, 2023 8:51 am
Last Updated:Oct 17, 2023 11:18 pm 13783 Views
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I was speaking to a friend the other day and at first i could barely understand her thru her tears. That in and of itself broke my heart because she is a very sweet person. She is strong and determined and still soft. Once i was able to get her to breathe and talk to me, i started to cry. She had met this guy. A Dom so he said. Speaking to him for weeks, he sounded great. Then on the drive to meet her, he started to change. The phone calls during his drive had become more of accusations. He went from seeing the glass half full and a gentleman to little things that one would not pick up on til after the fact. Small things really. She told him about something she saw that was sorta bad and that what she took away from this bad thing was something she turned around to view as a good lesson. His response was something she was shocked to hear. He started to verbally berate her. Now keep in mind this was the first time meeting in person. One would think that putting your best foot forward would be the thing to do. Instead, my friend spent the entire time with this guy showing that he was a total ass. Nothing was good, nothing she did was correct. Not only this but he literally complained and bitched about where they went and blamed her even tho he was the one who chose where they were to meet. When i finally got her to calm a bit, i told her the same thing i have to tell myself all the time. Just because you meet someone, does not mean they are going to be what they pretend to be. I finally got her to see how lucky she really was. The fact that he did this now instead of later. While i know its hard for those of us who truly need and are what we are, its very hard at times. Just because someone says they are a Dom does not mean they are a good one. Too many have begun to think Dom means to tear apart or use and destroy for their own benefit. A Dom does not do this at all. He values his property. Why would someone wish to live in a home that they destroy and tear down? Does this really make any sense? The trip for him was only a few hours, the pain she felt lasted almost all weekend. The good news after all of this? She now knows that its ok to tell someone to turn around. Its ok to say "no. because of what you are doing and or saying, i do not want to meet you". One of these days, both she and i will meet someone who can just be themselves. No hidden agendas or pretense. Just a real person, a good person, a person who is not perfect and yet perfect for each other. Not dead yet so there is hope.
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happy friday
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Posted:Oct 13, 2023 9:22 am
Last Updated:Oct 15, 2023 8:17 am 13434 Views
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Im here and breathing. thats what i got for now
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ahhhh.....what an element that people make
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Posted:Oct 9, 2023 8:09 pm
Last Updated:Oct 20, 2023 11:08 pm 14138 Views
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Today is the start of that dreaded 5 day period known as the work week. While some are bound to enjoy a most relaxing time via retirement or just don't have to do much that is not wanted anymore, others must suffer thru the modern day grind of work. I, however, have been job seeking due to my choice of leaving the company i ran. i figured out very fast that i would not do well in prison. That folks, is VERY handy information to know about oneself! Any who, while i am out and about and searching for my next avenue to savings and escape later in life, i realize that my head is starting to hurt. Not the debilitating pain from an actual headache or migraine. This folks, is so much worse. I had to deal with people again! This is something that is becoming a small issue for me. Well, ok, so mayhap not so small. When i am asked a question and i respond with "are you sure you want to know?". Please understand that this is not an actual question! Please consider this my one and only warning shot and act accordingly! What is sure to follow there after is more than likely going to dent your delicate flower feelings and you will more than likely leave crying. Please understand, I am not now, nor will i ever be Willy Wonka. I see the truth of things thru my eyes. I do not now, nor it seems, will i ever be able to sugar coat shit so its easy for others to swallow. Now don't get me wrong here, i do try to consider another's opinion and i do try to understand where others may be coming from. Yet, there is a time in some conversations where that button you have in your head gets hit with that clown hammer and that bell at the top of that thingy just rings and rings and rings. Hence the issue of my head pain today. Job seeking today is a whole different level of wtf jungle anymore. Once the head stops throbbing i am sure that i will be able to start laughing at the idiocy of things. I hope!
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Just some words i put together
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Posted:Oct 6, 2023 12:58 am
Last Updated:Oct 8, 2023 2:38 pm 14503 Views
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Beautifully Broken
I see you in all your pieces I see the large chunks that make the wall you protect yourself behind I see the smaller pieces that, like your thoughts, are scattered about I see the shards, the tiny slices of your heart that have been cut I see the debris so powdered that was once your confidence I see the haunted look in those beautiful eyes where once a fire raged and burned so bright I see the spark of your soul The spark that, even surrounded by all the broken pieces, refused to go out Let that spark meld those pieces back together Never the same alignment as before tho Now, you are beautifully broken
The Sadness Within
A heart that bleeds ever so silently while being passed by The person who must stay silent when their hearts desire is to speak The lost soul who wishes they were found The half who thinks never to be whole The unwanted who prays for acceptance Watching, waiting, crying, dying with none being the wiser The one who is always happy for others yet always alone The one who has so much sadness within
Questions.....
Can you be? Do you really think you are able to do this? Even though deep down I have so many insecurities and uncertainties about and within myself, this is the one thing i am very sure about. My questions to you are no out of disrespect but concern. Concern for my safety and that of others and yourself. i don't only speak of physical safety but also that of emotional and mental. Do you see that edge? That fine line that can cross boundaries between worlds and hearts. That fine line that holds both pain and pleasure. How close can you come to that edge? How close do you want or need to get to that edge? Can you take me to that edge? Can you keep me there and protect me? How do you feel about fire? Flames that dance, entice, engulf, and then create anew. Are you the one who can feed the fire to forge and form, to give the strength of purpose to what springs forth? While you ponder these questions, please give them the deepest thought and consideration. Ponder greatly for the one who asks is more fragile than the thinnest of glass. The one who asks has more hidden scars than the greatest of hillsides. Are you willing to travel? Life is a journey that is ever evolving. I am no longer the creature that came before. I am yet moving forward, ever changing and fluid, needing and striving. How strong are your hands? Can you? Do you? Would you? Every structure has a foundation. That foundation always starts with one tool....hands. Will you be able to use that tool to create the perfection that you wish for in your own sight? Are you willing to take the time to build a solid foundation to which you may stand upon while resting your gaze upon it with satisfaction and pleasure? How are you with rulers? Will you be able to take the measure of a thing to see past the surface into its core? Do you like storms? Will you be able to withstand the storm that a thing has become? As with everything, there is a beginning, a middle, and an end. This storm is simple, yet, complex. Would you find joy and pride in mastering this storm? Would you be able to revel in the havoc that you would control once you controlled the storm?
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Just a crazy day
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Posted:Oct 5, 2023 9:44 pm
Last Updated:Oct 6, 2023 12:09 am 14312 Views
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Just another day in the heat and sunshine here in Las Vegas. The sphere was lit up earlier. Something blue and moving was all I could see. Im lucky Im not down there with all the crazy traffic and construction! I moved out of all that to a more peaceful place. Still within driving distance and contact when I want to see a show or concert. Heck, even people watching can get very interesting at times! Sometimes it takes getting away from something to be better within yourself. Just because everything and most people here seem to think grab as grab can and the devil with the destruction left behind, does not mean that I have to join them. I can and do watch from afar tho. I cant help but to wonder how they will end. Its like a crash. Ya know what is gonna happen and yet, ya just cant seem to look away.
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Just for giggles
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Posted:Oct 4, 2023 3:42 pm
Last Updated:Oct 7, 2023 9:00 pm 14431 Views
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I decided to attach something I do to make me feel better. I etch the image into the back and push paint into the void for the image to be viewed from the front. This basically means i can read and write upside down and backwards. I also tend to see things differently. Frames are made by me also.
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