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Another Vintage Cartoon
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Posted:Nov 9, 2019 11:52 am
Last Updated:Nov 11, 2019 10:08 am 9029 Views
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“ Imagine the nerve—-he wanted to play love-me ,love me not with my daisies! “
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Vintage Cartoon...
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Posted:Nov 9, 2019 11:28 am
Last Updated:Nov 11, 2019 10:08 am 5903 Views
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“ Just let him tell you that can’t everything,then let him prove you wrong ! “
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These Are The 11 Sex Personality Types, According To A Sex Therapist Are you a Pleasure-Seeker or a
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Posted:Nov 7, 2019 4:39 pm
Last Updated:Jul 5, 2020 7:01 pm 6078 Views
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Are you a Pleasure-Seeker or a Prioritizer?
Some people have sex blow off steam when they’re stressed. Some do it feel more emotionally connected their partners. Others do it because all that physical touch feels amazing.
We’re motivated to have sex for different reasons and have varying definitions of what “good sex” is. That observation prompted sex therapist Vanessa Marin to try to identify different sexual “personality types” based on her work with over the past years.
“Just as it’s important for us understand what we’re looking for in a partner and in a relationship, we need know what we’re looking for of our sex life,” she told HuffPost.
After coming up with her own classifications, Marin polled people via her list and social media channels get their feedback and see if there were any types she’d missed. (She noted that her methods for gathering data were “not scientific by any means.”) Marin ended up with a list of sex personality types.
Any sort of attempt classify the entire population into just a handful of groups is never going to be perfect,” she said. “But I think it can be fun to for commonalities in our experiences.”
The Sex Personality Types
figure your type, read through the descriptions and see which resonates the most with you. If a few sound close, try rank your top in order so you can identify your primary type.
1. The Decompresser
When you’re feeling overwhelmed, sex is your go- stress reliever. You relish the physical and mental release that orgasms offer. You may even use sex (solo or partnered) help you fall asleep at night.
“Sex is a way that you blow off steam and unwind,” Marin wrote in her blog post. “You may seek sex because you’re feeling tense, or you may simply enjoy spending time basking in the afterglow when sex is over.”
But sometimes you’re so fixated on the finish that you forget enjoy the ride.
“You may also come off your partner as not being particularly present or engaged in the moment since you’re so focused on the end,” Marin said HuffPost.
2. The Explorer
For you, sex is all about trying new things between the sheets, having fun and not taking it too seriously. You’re sexually curious, you’re willing to learn and you crave novelty.
“You’re open to trying something even if you’re not sure that you’ll like it,” Marin said. “You can laugh about it if your explorations don’t work out in the end.”
3. The Fair-Trader
Generosity and a healthy give-and-take in the bedroom are crucial for the Fair-Trader. You expect your partner to meet your needs with enthusiasm, and you’ll gladly do the for them.
“You want know that your partner enjoys giving just as much as you enjoy receiving, and vice versa,” Marin explained in her blog post.
It can throw you off if you sense that your partner isn’t as into it as you are.
“If your partner seems a little disconnected during a particular session, you may find yourself getting up in your head, unable to enjoy the experience,” the therapist told HuffPost. “Sometimes that can feel a little exhausting to your partner.”
4. The Giver
In your eyes, sex is a gift to share with your partner.
“Your partner’s sexual experience is at least as important to you as your own, and probably even more so,” Marin wrote. “You’re very in tune with your partner’s experience, and it makes you feel good to know that you can make your partner feel good.”
This may mean you have trouble receiving when it’s your turn.
“You may feel uncomfortable being the focus of attention or just receiving without also reciprocating in the moment,” Marin told HuffPost.
5. The Guardian
Feeling safe with your sexual partner is of the utmost importance. You may have dealt with sexual trauma in your past.
“You like feeling that foundation of security with your partner and with yourself,” the blog post explains. “Your boundaries are important to you, as is enthusiastic consent.”
6. The Passion-Pursuer
For you, sex isn’t good unless it’s intense and all-consuming — maybe even animalistic.
“You’re very in tune with the energy between you and your partner during sex,” Marin wrote. “You love the idea of letting go and losing yourself in the moment. For you, the best sex is when time seems to stand still.”
7. The Pleasure-Seeker
The physical pleasure you feel during sex is what keeps you coming back for more (and more). Simply put: You like feeling good.
“You may even be confused about all of these different personality types, because you think sex is just of those simple pleasures in life,” the therapist wrote. “You enjoy touch and physical throughout the day too.”
For you, sex doesn’t have to be emotional or overly intimate ― it can be enjoyed with someone you just met.
8. The Prioritizer
No matter how busy you are, sex remains a top priority for you. Even when you’re tired, you want to find time for a roll in the hay and will plan accordingly to make sure it happens.
“You value your sex life, and you’re willing to spend time on it and make sacrifices for it,” according to the blog post. “You like sex to be consistent. You may even like having a specific routine with how often you have sex.”
9. The Romantic
For you, the purpose of sex is to connect with your partner on an emotional level, not just a physical one. You may enjoy more intimate sex that involves caressing, eye and exchanging “I love yous.” You want stay present and not rush the experience.
“The Romantic and the Passion-Pursuer are pretty similar, but the Romantic needs have emotional intimacy with a partner,” Marin said. “-night stands just aren’t your thing.”
10. The Spiritualist
“You think sex should be a transcendent experience,” Marin wrote on her site. “Sex is bigger than what’s happening in the body. You may be religious, or you may enjoy Eastern philosophies like Tantra.”
If you grew up in a religion with rigid moral views about sexuality, it may be difficult for you enjoy a healthy sex life without feeling ashamed or judged.
“For some Spiritualists, the connection religion can pose challenges,” Marin explained HuffPost. “Your religion may have certain guidelines that you don’t fully agree with or that evoke shame for you.”
. The Thrill-Seeker
Your sexual interests aren’t vanilla and that’s the way you like it. BDSM, kink or taboo sexual fantasies don’t scare you off ― they excite you.
“You may enjoy an element of power in your sex life, like allowing your partner dominate you, or dominating your partner,” Marin wrote. “Whereas the Explorer simply likes exploration for exploration’s sake, you crave that sense of the taboo.”
Why Knowing Your Type Matters
Think of it this way: If you haven’t figured what aspects of sex are most important you, how can you communicate what you want a partner?
“The sex personality type model creates a framework for opening that conversation,” Marin told HuffPost. And by knowing your partner’s sex personality type as well, you can do a better job of making sure their needs are being met.
Marin uses the model with her to help clear up sex-related miscommunications and misunderstandings. She gave as an example with whom she worked a few years back: The husband told his wife he wanted to try some new things in the bedroom. The wife was upset by this and he couldn’t understand why. While he was excited about the prospect of experimenting with the woman he loved, he didn’t realize that she interpreted the suggestion as a sign that he was unhappy with their sex life.
Marin helped them see that they shared the goal — feel connected each other and have a satisfying sex life. They were just approaching it in different ways.
“Exploration was the husband’s ‘language’ for experiencing connection,” Marin said. “Once the wife realized that it wasn’t a critique, she was able see that he ultimately wanted the thing she did.”
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Is It Possible To Use Your Vibrator Too Much?
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Posted:Oct 26, 2019 11:08 am
Last Updated:Nov 23, 2020 12:24 pm 5708 Views
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Experts debunk myths like whether a sex toy can desensitize the clitoris for good and if vibrators are actually "addictive."
ByKelsey Borresen
As a , I remember believing that if you used a vibrator “too much,” you could do irreparable damage to your lady parts. One day, you’d be enjoying a little masturbation sesh courtesy of your favorite sex toy when — poof! — your clitoris would go numb and stay that way. And just like that, you’d kiss orgasms goodbye forever. (Because, you know, roughy 37% of women need clitoral stimulation in order to climax, according to a 2017 survey.)
In internet parlance, the idea that overusing a vibrator might cause permanent desensitization of the clitoris is known as “dead vagina syndrome” (charming, no?). But is this actually a thing or just another B.S. sex myth? We talked to sex experts to get the buzz.
So, can a vibrator desensitize the clitoris?
Using a vibrator can numb the clitoris — but only temporarily.
“There is no empirical evidence that vibrator use can cause a lasting desensitization of the clitoris,” Nan Wise, a sex therapist, neuroscientist and author of “Why Good Sex Matters,” told HuffPost.
Typically, the diminished sensitivity down there, if it happens at all, won’t last long. A 2009 study published in the Journal of Sexual Medicine found that roughly 71% of women who have used a vibrator have never had any side effects — which include genital numbness, pain, irritation, swelling or inflammation and tears or cuts. Of the roughly 16% who had experienced genital numbness, only 0.5% reported that the numbness lasted a day or more.
“Think of it this way: You know when you sit on your leg for a while and your foot becomes numb? After a while, it returns to normal and everything is fine,” said Gigi Engle, a sexologist and author of “All the F*cking Mistakes: A Guide to Sex, Love, and Life.” Similarly, give your clitoris a little time to recuperate and you should be back to normal in no time.
If the temporary numbness bothers you, you can always put the vibrator on a lower setting, use it over your underwear or find another toy that’s less intense, said Nazanin Moali, a sex therapist and host of the podcast “Sexology.”
OK, but can you become “addicted” to your vibrator?
The short answer is no. Clinical research doesn’t support the claim that a person can become physically or psychologically addicted to a sex toy. Another related concern is that women who use vibrators for solo sex will become so hooked on their toys that they’ll lose all desire to have sex with partners, namely male ones.
“This is an old myth that continually gets perpetuated to shame female sexuality,” Engle said.
One thing to note: People who use vibrators regularly may grow accustomed to orgasming quickly and dependably, which could create unrealistic expectations around climaxing other ways — like by rubbing the clitoris or during vaginal or oral sex. That’s why it’s good to change things up by taking different routes to orgasm so you don’t get too reliant on any one way.
“Depending on the intensity of stimulation with vibrators, many women would be able to reach orgasm in under five minutes,” Moali said. “However, we also should keep in mind that it is perfectly normal and healthy for a partnered sex to take longer if they choose not to incorporate sex toys.”
But if you feel your vibrator use is interfering with your daily life — you start showing up late to work, skipping social obligations or isolating from your partner, for example — then it might be worth examining the habit.
“Some people who struggle with emotional regulation might use sex as their primary way of coping with difficult emotions, which might lead to developing a pattern of out-of-control sexual behaviors,” Moali said.
What about other health concerns?
Although you don’t need to worry about doing permanent damage to your clitoris, there are a few potential health-related issues to be aware of. You could irritate the vulva if you’re not cleaning your vibrator properly (follow the directions from the manufacturer, as different materials may need to be handled differently).
“And if you are using a vibrator that’s inserted into the vagina, make sure the device is properly designed for such usage and is sufficiently lubricated by an appropriate device-compatible lube to minimize irritation of the lining of the vagina,” Wise said.
Wise also cautioned against using a toy that was inserted into the anus on other parts of the body, like the mouth or vagina, as the device could spread fecal matter and bacteria to those areas.
If you’re sharing sex toys with your partner or other people, you could potentially spread or contract sexually transmitted infections, such as chlamydia and herpes. Practice safe sex by covering the toy with a new condom and then properly cleaning it after each use.
And if you’re experiencing lasting numbness in your genital area, see a doctor. The culprit could be a medical or psychological issue, not your vibrator.
“It may be due to hormonal changes associated with menopause or other medical reasons,” Wise said. “Feel free to speak up to your doctor if anything seems amiss in your sex life.”
Are there benefits to using a vibrator?
TARA MOORE VIA GETTY IMAGES
Heck yeah, there are. Remember that the vibrator is a tool of pleasure that’s meant to be enjoyed, not something to be scared of or demonized. In fact, using one may offer a host of benefits physically, mentally and emotionally.
For one, vibrators teach you about your body and what feels good to you.
“They can show you how to have orgasms if you’ve never had one before,” Engle said.
That knowledge can also help you feel more confident and empowered when it comes to sex with a partner, too.
“Developing a solo practice in which a woman brings herself to orgasm could potentially increase her confidence to show their partner what they need to feel pleasure and orgasm,” said Sari Cooper, sex therapist and director of the Center for Love and Sex NYC.
Not to mention that the orgasms you get from a session with your vibrator can boost your mood and help you relax and unwind.
“It’s a mindful experience that keeps women in the present moment and stops worries from intruding on a full body-mind relaxation,” Cooper said.
What’s more, vibrator use seems to be correlated with a bunch of good stuff, Wise said, including better overall sexual functioning in terms of desire and arousal, vaginal lubrication, less pain and more orgasms.
Need we say more? Now let the good vibes roll.
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Everything You Wanted To Know About Period Sex (But Were Afraid To Ask)
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Posted:Oct 2, 2019 2:53 pm
Last Updated:Oct 10, 2019 12:40 pm 5967 Views
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Experts — as well as men and women who love period sex — share how to make sex during your menstrual cycle more enjoyable.
By Brittany Wong ....
Article from Life Magazine ...
Is there anything as polarizing, sexually speaking, as period sex?
There are many people who sing its praises. (Orgasms can relieve cramps and the cluster headaches so many women experience while menstruating, one 2013 study found. Plus, some women experience a surge in their sex drive while on their periods, so why not capitalize on that?) But there are just as many who balk at the idea.
Some who are anti-period sex find the whole experience ― or at least the messy aftermath ― not unlike a crime scene. Naturally, there will be blood. (And of course, sex during menstruation is religiously frowned upon in some cases; in certain sects of Judaism, for instance, observant women refrain from sex during their periods.)
But fans of period sex are fervent in their support. Malcolm, a 24-year-old studying advertising in Rio de Janeiro, is firmly pro-period sex. Sure, things can get a little messy in the moment, but it’s nothing that a little prep work ― namely, throwing down a dark-colored towel before sex ― can’t take care of.
“It’s a turn-on for me. I think of period sex as a little change in an otherwise quiet month,” said Malcom, who, like others in this article, preferred to be identified by first name only for privacy.
“Plus, as a boyfriend, I think it’s close to torture to deny sex to a woman during her most hormonally troubled days,” he said. (“Hormonally troubled days” ― we’re absolutely going to borrow that one, Malcom,)
For the disinclined or uninterested, it’s often the blood factor that makes period sex a no-go. Bryce, a 19-year-old from New Castle, Pennsylvania, felt that way for a long time.
“I think guys are squeamish just over the thought of blood,” he said. “Before I did it, it always made me uncomfortable to think about it. The idea kind of made me lose my sex drive.”
But once he tried it, he quickly became a fan.
“I did it because my girlfriend at the time was in the mood, and I loved the feeling of it,” he said. “Even with a condom on, you can notice a difference. And for me personally, I got more out of it because I was making her feel good and taking away some of the pain of her period cramps.”
Bryce’s earlier reservations about period sex are understandable, given how taboo a topic menstruation still is in our society, said Cyndi Darnell, a sex therapist in New York.
“Until recently, women’s periods were never depicted in feminine hygiene ads beyond blue inky water,” she said. “As a result, lot of heterosexual, cisgender men have no idea what a period even looks like.”
The problem is exacerbated by the associations most of us have regarding blood, Darnell said.
“The only time we encounter vast quantities of blood is during horror or gore, so the mind will associate such visuals with period sex, even though many women find it highly pleasurable,” she said.
On the opposite end of the spectrum, some people get turned on by the blood. (Not everyone who’s into period sex is necessarily into the broader blood fetish, but some are.) For other period sex fans, it’s the fact that doing it on your period is still so taboo that gets them off.
“If I’m not supposed to have it, then I want it even more, which heightens arousal when it actually happens,” said Amy Baldwin, a sex educator and co-host of the Shameless Sex Podcast. “Plus, I find it super sexy because it suggests that a lover accepts and relishes in all aspects of me.”
Wherever you stand on period sex ― pro, indifferent, “no thanks, I’m squeamish around blood” ― it couldn’t hurt to learn more about it and demystify the experience a bit. Here are a few things experts in the sexual health field want everyone to know about period sex:
1. Periods are completely natural. So is period sex.
As with most erotic experiences, period sex is a matter of personal preference and cultural attitudes. That said, if you’re allowing Aunt Flo to stand in the way of sex you otherwise want to have, it might be worth reflecting on your overall attitudes toward periods, said Chris Maxwell Rose, the co-host of the weekly podcast “Speaking of Sex” with the Pleasure Mechanics.
If you’re someone who gets a period and feels grossed out by period sex, ask yourself why being on your period makes you feel dirty or embarrasses you. Really sit with your answers and try to examine them.
“It’s important to confront and overcome the period shame that most of us have carried around, to one degree or another,” she said. “The goal is to get to a ‘period neutral’ place.”
That doesn’t mean you have to love your period or “water your plants out of your menstrual cup to rid yourself of shame,” Rose said jokingly. It just means treating your menstrual cycle ― and all that it entails ― more matter of factly.
“From a more neutral stance, you can start by thinking about how you feel about sex during your period,” she explained.
Speaking of uneasiness around periods, it’s also time partners, too, get over the period taboo.
“A lot of guys are fascinated by vulvas and vaginas and everything about them,” Rose said. “In regards to period sex, being invited into the experience by someone who isn’t grossed out by their own body can be eye opening for these guys.”
2. Don’t forget the lube. And dark towels.
One of the much-touted benefits of period sex is that period fluids make for great lube and heighten the sensation of sex. But tampons can absorb natural discharge and make things drier down there, so you may not want to forgo lube entirely.
“Have a great lubricant on hand ... as period sex can actually dry things up with plenty of friction,” Baldwin said.
As for the inevitable mess, Baldwin suggested investing in a black waterproof blanket. Otherwise, just lay down dark-colored towels before you get started so you have less mess to worry about later. Having shower sex is another smart way to curb the messiness factor.
3. Also, don’t forgo protection.
It’s true that the odds of getting pregnant while on your period are low, but it does happen.
“Many people assume that conception categorically cannot occur when we have our period, but just ask a woman who conceived during her period how reliable that is,” Darnell said.
Another reason to use protection during period sex? There may be a heightened risk of spreading a sexually transmitted infection, said Janet Brito, a psychologist and sex therapist at the Center for Sexual and Reproductive Health in Hawaii.
“If you have HIV or hepatitis, there is a higher chance that you can spread the virus because both of these viruses originate in the blood,” she said. “Bottom line: It’s always best to use a condom.”
4. Take pleasure in knowing you’re probably providing your partner with some pain relief.
When we orgasm, the body releases oxytocin and dopamine along with other endorphins. That flood of feel-good hormones can ease period-related pains, especially menstrual cramps and pelvic pain.
“For some women, a great orgasm or two is the best relief for menstrual cramping,” Rose said.
In other words, by having period sex, you might be helping your partner de-stress and alleviate pain. You’re like the patron saint of menstruation!
At the very least, by showing your interest in period sex, you’re proving to your partner that there’s nothing icky about having a period. As our sex-positive, pro-period-sex buddy Malcolm put it: “You like women, and women [often] come with periods,” he said. “It’s just part of the package.”
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