The '' performance.....
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Posted:May 9, 2015 4:43 pm
Last Updated:Jul 4, 2016 4:50 pm 53218 Views
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Details..
it starts at home before getting ready, i start to think of ways out, reasons for not going, yet i know i will...
getting ready can be stressful, if others are around.... i get tense... usually having to put stockings, high shoes, make up into bag and change in the car... the times i am alone i enjoy the 'primping' taking my time...
driving, almost from the very beginning, has been the same... focusing, leaving thoughts/worries of reality behind, a_mused settling..... then i feel my cunt reacting, clenching, tingling, preparing... knowing then that i will arrive wet....
i put on make up in the car..... slowly, carefully... painting on the ..... sometimes hands trembling, not so much recently..... i make the phone call.... this is usually calming too... sometimes they sound nervous and my natural reaction is to put them at ease, sometimes they sound confident and this encourages me...
stomach tightening, sometimes almost cramping.... clearing head, i walk to the hotel entrance, calm, confident on the outside, there for any reason.....
the walk to the door, i deliberately walk slowly, walk tall, breathe deep...... i never hesitate once at the door... i dont give myself time to flee..... i fleetingly imagine him on the other side, also wondering who awaits him..... I also look around hoping to see You there watching me, as I know You have done many times before.....
the door opens... sometimes i feel a relief.... sometimes i have to focus on the role/scene not the man... however, once i've touched them, made contact, a_mused is engaged doing what she does... finding something about all of them to connect with, quickly.. instant intimacy.....
i can be coy.... then the physicality takes over... i can be wanton, needy.... ' a bitch in heat' said ...... then after, switch to sweet, virgin slut.... interested in only them for that time, attentive, flirtatious..... never looking at the time.... acting as if there is no place in the world i'd rather be... my hands never leaving them, caressing, stroking, until it's time to dress and leave.....
once ready to go a_mused always heads for the door, then turns back for one final kiss as if she'd rather be staying... often a whispered 'thank you'.... then gone...
once outside, a deep breathe... a big sigh, checking appearance in car mirror.... sorting out money... buzzing, mulling over the experience, driving back to homelife.... alive....
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Sent as a ...... Knowingly, embracing it....
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Posted:May 3, 2015 8:18 am
Last Updated:Jul 31, 2020 7:36 am 57276 Views
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what's to say.... He seemed a nice guy, not older... well didn't look it... slim but fleshy, hairy, nice responsive cock though.....
so from receiving the instructions from You, i went through my usual... wtf???? moments, so unfair, unreasonable, I hate not knowing the things that You know, really pisses me off, i think because i feel that way it stops me feeling prepared to please, to do well... and i'm uncomfortable around deceit that way (ironic i know)..... I never had a doubt i'd do this one though..... drove so calm, excitement building as getting closer... i found the hotel and rang... saying i was 5 mins away, i liked his voice, knew it was going to be ok.... put some make up on, took some deep breathes, text a bastard (You) with the room number and went in......
kind of a shabby, airport hotel, nice lobby, basic rooms, he apologised, said he'd hoped it would be a nicer hotel... some small talk... how did i feel, had i done this before? .... i asked him now often he did it (about once a month).... he sat on the bed and i walked and stood in front of him.... he asked what i had on under the dress... so i stood and removed my dress.... he was happy..... He took some money and tucked it in my cleavage, under my shoulder strap, had a feel of my tits... i caressed his face as he felt, leant over to kiss his neck.. whispering 'i like necks'... and 'i like hands' taking his hand in mine, cupping my face in his palm, mouth suckling on fingers... he groaned.... 'I'm going to enjoy you,, i'm going to fuck you... .....
he asked me to stand in front of the big wall mirror, he sat on the bed behind.... i placed my hands on the wall, pulling my top low to free my tits, money falling.. lifting arse, arching back... so he could see hanging my tits and feel arse, legs... hair falling.... catching his eyes in the mirror.... 'fuck you are sexy' he said,,' fuck, fuck.'.. standing up, hands reaching round to my breasts, i strain backwards, grinding arsecheeks to his groin... 'see how hard you've got me? fucking bitch'... i smile, hands reaching round behind me to undo his belt... feeling his groin.... then turning around, kneeling and pulling his jeans and boxers down.... mouth so close to his cock... closer... hands guiding him to sit on the bed, then sucking, licking, kissing.... he's whispering.. 'you fucking bitch, thats so good.....' letting me explore, tease... then pulling me on to the bed, taking the lace body off, saying he wanted to taste me...
His mouth to my cunt... saying i tasted good, felt good, loved my pussy.... making me cum on his mouth... feeling me writhe to pull away after, wriggling under to get to his cock again.... then devouring his mouth with my own.. telling him how i could taste myself..... lying on his back.. doing my 'oral thing'... him saying i was made for cock sucking.. my body was made for fucking.... i move upwards straddling him... rubbing my wet slit over his shaft.... he flips me over, and his cock pushes at my cunt.... i say 'are you going to fuck me now?' he groans yesss.... i ask if he has condoms.. he says no, do i.... 'of course i do... don't whores provide?' he presses at my cunt entrance again and i tell him i'll get them... he says 'fuck sorry, I always said i'd never dream of barebacking with a girl, but fuck, fuck, your pussy, god....'. i slide from under him.. get the condoms....
he says no, first he wants to cum in my mouth... wants me to show him the cum in my mouth... i sit between his thighs, working it, hands, fingers, mouth, tongue...... he cums..... i lift my head, laughing, open my mouth and his cum drools onto his belly....
I go to the bathroom and gets a towel.... cleans his belly with towel and tongue... and rests under his arm..... he tells me he loves his wife.. loves her to pieces, would never leave her, they just only have sex about once a month and it's not enough for him.... he asks if i like women, reply 'i have lots of needs, this being one, another women too.... ' i turn him to lie on his front and caress his back, legs, feet, hands and mouth.... kissing his neck, spine arse.. thighs..... turning him back over, leaning over him, rubbing his face with my tits, dragging nipple to nipple across his mouth... he's tells me to sit on his face..... so i do.... leaning over to suck him too.... cunt climaxing on his mouth again and then turning to focus on his cock... my bottom facing the mirror, he watches... seeing my mouth on his cock and my cunt in the mirror.... i reach for the condom... sit astride him... riding his cock......
finally he flips me over... i writhe wild under him until he cums in me........
he's happy... says he's had a great time... would i do it again... gathers up the cash and gives it to me... tells me my tits are fanastic, are they real?? tellls me to check out his 'reveiws' on his profile... says he would write on mine if i wanted.... he asked what he could call me... i said ami .... he said he hopes i wasn't disappointed that he wasnt raunchy enough for me.... i said no, i could be a sensual .... he agreed....
I washed and dressed quickly, leaving the room before him, cash in my bag, smiles of my face.... Text You again to say I was done, safe, out.....
On the drive back I was on a high.... Some relief, some strange pride..... I felt alive, body tingling, mind fucked.... Not feeling the horror of what I'd done, just leaving desired, valuable, empowered..... No shame....
Later that evening I slumped.... Disgust... Yet not feeling it was real... So compartmentalised my life has become... The distance between the 'boxes' huge......
I'm sending the account now.... I hope You are happy and his 'feedback' was good...
PS. I still hate You, bastard... Xxxx
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Sent to serve, again.... Unknowingly whored....
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Posted:Apr 30, 2015 1:56 pm
Last Updated:Jan 7, 2016 4:08 pm 58736 Views
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Travelling, easier this time knowing what I was facing..... I'd bathed, been waxed, worn the demure maxi dress, silk lingerie he loved underneath....
sexually, much the same as the previous time.... same inept wrist binding.... slightly more spanking and the occasional bum bite.... he liked hearing that i'd bought the panties with him in mind... spend alot of time burying his face into them... nuzzling, biting them.... lots of attention to my pussy in general.. playing with my lips.. licking, kissing.. wanting me sitting on his face... wanting one leg on the floor the other across the bed so my cunt was open wide across his face.. put me on hands to knees to fuck my arse...
He loves to finger me... he was wanking himself while fingering me, while i rubbed my clit, watching me cum.... eventually he knelt between my legs and came over my belly, mound, my hand cradling his balls, finger pressing his perineum.... took me to the shower, washed cum off me, told me to kneel... his held his cock and pissed over my tits, guiding from one to the other, aiming at hard nipples... really long piss too.... after he washed me again and we dried and chatted back in bed for a while.....
he said he found it hard to connect me with any 'dark' stuff, cause i was so sweet... then asked if i would like he to do 'those' things with me.... he asked if i would go to lunch with him later this week.... he told me he had bought a new bed, a bigger one and was thinking the best way to christen it.. i laughed and said well you'd need to fill it, he said exactly what he had in mind, me and another... then i was wicked... i kissed him gently and said... maybe i don't want to share you..... he was wided eyed.. 'really'.... then he said well you could redress that by being here for a longer time yourself.... i just smiled....
he was definitely more confident this time... more assertive.... kept asking what i'd give him for his birthday, when i asked how his date last week went he said .. ok, but he wouldnt be seeing her again as he didnt find her physically attractive....
I dressed and we were downstairs.... He slipped an envelope into my bag... I looked questioningly... 'My email' He said... I got to my car and open the envelope .... Cash, notes.... I felt as if I'd been kicked in the stomach.... I felt rage at You, I said I was no , I didn't want money... Couldn't do it... How dare You???
Then to my horror and shame I felt proud and valued and warm fuzzy feelings...
I still hate You for that though.....
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The 'Daddy Dom' Dynamic.....
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Posted:Apr 27, 2015 11:06 am
Last Updated:Nov 29, 2023 4:33 pm 59838 Views
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The need for a DaddyDom dynamic was one i resisted and refused to recognise for long time. It was hidden by the issues around sex abuse, protection and sexuality, that i was surrounded with constantly at work, together with the taboos of and wrongs of sexual harm. But i felt myself drawn to the 'Daddies' on-line, many of them the most depraved people there.. but many offering what i began to realise i needed, craved, though denied.
To be clear, i wasn't sexually abused as a and didn't want to be sexual with my own father at any time, though i do remember being aware of his own 'flings', overhearing him on the phone, fantasising that he might catch me and feeling an inexplicable excitement about what my punishment could be.....
i was sexually aware at a very young age, but never sought real contact, even then i found solace in adult reading and my imagination. But now, as a women, i can still feel that internal and her longings, and now as an adult can seek to fulfil them.
For me the desire for a this dynamic has many aspects to it... He is not a biological father.. He is a Man who can see the sexuality inside that young mind and body and see its struggle and confusion, its need to be released and understood. The girl has no secrets from her Him, nothing is hidden or forbidden, she obeys to His authority, without question, just for who He is. He can mold her to His needs completely, she has no-one to compare to Him, He is 'the' Man she serves. He guides her to please Him as He requires, she does not know what is the 'norm',so would not question His desires. At the same time, she is His creation, so he understands her desires completely.. He knows best - absolute... He has the unconditional love only a Father figure can, but the highest expectations of His baby girl too.. He can be indulgent.. He can be harsh.. His' displeasure and disappointment cuts deep, likewise to make Him proud will make her fly... in many ways it is the ultimate ownership... and in my perverse mind when Daddy is ready to show off His girl, to share her, then that is right too...
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Blood.....
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Posted:Apr 25, 2015 3:19 am
Last Updated:Oct 27, 2016 1:51 pm 53809 Views
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Rich.. dark.. hot, menstrual blood.... i feel its heat in my cunt, i feel the fall of its' flow... watch the strands fall, swirl into the water, alive... shocking crimson against white porcelain, smeared on pale flesh... digits glazed, tongue tasting.... a scent easily recalled, earthy, sweet, cloying with heavy femininity... an addictive taboo... body responding when mind recoils.... i love that odour..
my blood flows today and i crave to embrace and indulge in it.. not cleanse and flush it away, not hide it.. but paint and taste and share..... not to imprison it, soak it up, deny its existence... but display it's macabre beauty.. it's lust... it's magic... power...
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Sent by One to another......
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Posted:Apr 21, 2015 12:14 pm
Last Updated:Jul 31, 2020 7:45 am 54754 Views
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Actions - standing, arms round, hands roaming, first feel.. kissing... turning me around, hands feeling front, mouth to my neck... standing before him... dress comes off... hands over lace.. freeing breasts, hands over them, twisting nipples, mouth sucking... kneeling, hands on back of sofa, him kissing my slit through the lace, hands over buttocks, turning me round, kneeling between my legs, slowly undoing the poppers, mouth at my cunt... my hands caressing, never stopping, kisses to neck, face, chest.. undoing his shirt... kneeling undoing belt, trousers, taking them off, at his feet as he stands, mouth trailing over feet, shins, thighs, both legs, my torso naked now, nuzzling his cock through his pants, biting at his cock tip... fingers tugging at them, feeling his shaft through the fabric... pulling them down slowly, his cock dripping with pre-cum.. just tongue, lapping.. his tip, shaft, balls, sucking... worshipping as i kneel between his legs as he stands.. hands stroking thighs.... begging to suck, whimpering at being made to wait.....
him lying on the floor... travelling from his feet, kissing them, sucking, nibbling.. hair trailing over his legs, sliding up over his groin, mouth kissing, hair over chest now, mouth to his nipples, grinding onto his body... flipped over, his arms tight around me..... them moving to sofa, lying back, i kneel... suck.. balls, cock... take deep.. tease... press it between my tits... kiss soft, swallow hard..... then upstairs........
on bed.. his mouth to my cunt, fingers in me, i'm writhing and bucking at the touch... head over bed, as he stands, sucking again.. his hands on my body..... then cock in me... on top of me... slow first... grinding... my legs wrapped around him tight... then faster.... positions changing....
fucking, fucking..... getting on top... slowly,watching my pussy stretch and cover his cock, long, slow, strokes.. he watches, watches.....
i lie on the bed, he kneels between my legs.. his hand on his cock... My eyes moving from his to his cock.... watching his cum spew over my tummy, tits, face, my hands smearing it over..... my mouth soft, gentle on sensitive cock, sucking him dry.. tongue swirling... he shivers.........
His words.... Pretty dress, love the lace, you did well.... fantastic tits... directions... do you want this.. tell me how much... beautiful eyes.. aren't you are gorgeous... wonderful tiny wrists and hands... good girl, good girl... that looks and feels beautiful... your mouth is so soft and warm... fuck is hot there... i love your pussy lips, i can't stop stroking them..... see how hard i am.. fuck thats hard... i love how my cock feels in you.... you taste so good... suck it, kiss.. slowly..... kiss my face.... that was 'really' good sex.. fuck... i need to see you again soon.... will you come back?.... would you come for a drink with me? ........
......... hooked? Besotted ........?
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In the morning....
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Posted:Apr 19, 2015 9:11 am
Last Updated:Jul 31, 2020 7:44 am 52835 Views
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her lips curled into a small smile as her mouth enveloped His cock in the sweet liquid, swallowing, feeling her tongue swirl around His tip...
pulling away, looking up at Him as she laps at the trickles dripping over His thighs, lips softly moving to kiss and caress softly over His balls...
delighting in the slow, tender movements after the excesses of the night before....
dragging herself up over His body, lips constantly pressing to His flesh, travelling over Him, tasting, imprinting Him to her memory...
finally reaching His neck, nuzzling against it, kisses so light, her body molding into His, His arm around her, skin to skin, flesh to flesh...
her head lifting, tongue flicking to his ear, followed by a quiet whisper... 'do you want me?'
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The end of the evening...... Just One more....
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Posted:Apr 16, 2015 7:47 am
Last Updated:Mar 5, 2024 9:47 am 52757 Views
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she was lying, resting now.. His body curled around her back, His arms around her.... her breathe finally settling, tears drying... her mouth moistened from the drink He had tenderly given, before pulling her tired, trembling frame into His... her eyes heavy, mind drifting, listening to the quiet voices in the room, as people relaxed, rested... her limbs feeling heavier as her mind floats away, safe in His grip... His voice soothing her thoughts... He talks to the others, occasionally whispering a soft private word to her ear.... her head replays the evening, slowly, imprinting it into her memory, identifying the feelings, recognising the responses... dark, warm, sinking bliss....
then she feels His fingers tighten in her hair, His grasp awakening her... His hand yanking her head back, her eyes open... she sees a cock, hard, ready, straight before her face..... His hand pushing her forward.. the softness gone.... He speaks, 'one more' .... 'now'... the Man kneels by the bed, His shaft waiting..... her Man still holds her.. one hand entwined in her hair.. the other circling around her slender throat.. His fingers feeling her quickening pulse.... holding her as her mouth works, offering her throat, feeling her gag reflex press against His fingers as He controls her movements..... it doesn't take long.. the cum pumping into her held open mouth.. His hand squeezing tighter to feel her swallow... whispering... 'good girl'.... and holding her close again.... she shivers... molds back into Him.. returns to her place... dreaming.. was she dreaming.....
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Roller coaster ride.... A short while into O.our Journey......
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Posted:Apr 13, 2015 11:50 am
Last Updated:Jul 31, 2020 7:45 am 51868 Views
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the rollarcoaster... once you get on and it starts, there's no getting off... fearing what's ahead, not knowing the design... twisting through the start, high on the relief of getting there... resting into the slow climb of the next descent or fall... as the anxiety rises, as time stands still.. the inevitable drop, spin, twist getting closer and closer... breathless... surreal... pulse pounding.. spinning out of control.. yet strangely safe....
it takes me high.. then drops me... it thrills and terrifies.. fills me with delight and rage... the doubts chattering away in my head, ignored by the overwhelming faith that this is right... silenced by my compulsion to comply... the anger flaring because You are right when i don't want You to be... because You have what i need... because You hold the key... because where others made promises, You delivered them...
fearful of the vulnerability i feel getting closer... the dependency growing, addiction gripping... this strange recklessness.. putting all my eggs/needs in one basket so to speak.... new parts of me being revealed, transitions taking place... becoming what i always was... showing You little by little the darkness i hold...
i don't like rollarcoasters... sometimes i want it all to stop, and yet, that is the most devastating thought of all.....
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Those early desires, the frustration, the need......
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Posted:Apr 8, 2015 10:41 am
Last Updated:Mar 7, 2024 3:05 pm 57614 Views
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i remembered the first night it had happened.. changing at my best friends house... applying more make-up, putting on the heels... giggling like the we still were, yet our minds, our desires, on adult deeds... clearly too young to access the club, but no-one seemed to mind... loads of us did it.. i was the youngest but carefully blended into the crowd of slightly older girls as we passed by the door staff... we were fresh and we knew it.. dancing close together, feeling the eyes of the older boys, the Men, on our barely blossoming bodies... there was one Guy, i thought He was gorgeous, so cool, distance, just standing watching us, watching me... i kept glancing His way, turning as i danced in front of Him, barelegs, baby smooth, swinging short skirt, the cropped vest top just covering my flat stomach, little breasts free beneath the fine fabric, high, round, untouched...
the music changed, as always the slow songs at the end of the evening, i cheeks flushed, body covered in a sheen of perspiration from the dancing.. i walked towards the table my crowd had inhabited and as i passed by His hand reached out, fingers completely encasing my wrist... He leant forward, whispering into my ear, almost mocking.. 'does the little girl dare dance?'.... before i could answered He laughed and turned away... my face blushing crimson.. my legs shaking, forcing myself to breathe through the humiliation and return to the table... He turns back around as i sat down, looking me directly in the eye, still laughing... i felt sick, sick with embarrassment, sick with desire... my stomach twisting in knots... then He left....
outside walking home, the air cold.. my hair sticking to the sweat on the back of my neck... one friend nudged me, eyes looking to one side.. He was there, waiting, beckoning... i hesitated.. my friends giggling again, half envious, half fearful... he called out.. 'don't worry, I'll see her home, safe with me'..... i nod to my girls and walk almost trance like towards Him.. like a moth to a flame.... heart pounding, body tingling with an unknown sensation.... He took my hand in His and we walked.... His fingers caressing my wrist.... as we reached the end of the lane, He steered me away from the path.... i slowed, pulling against his Hand.. He smiled.. 'don't worry... I need a piss'.. i look and see the old public toilets in the lay-by... i take a deep breathe.... relaxing slightly... as we reached the doorway His hand grips harder and He yanks me into the dark room... damp, smelling of urine... He presses me against the wall, His frame completely covering mine... breathing into my neck, a hand on my breast, rough, tugging at the flesh... His mouth finding mine, lips taking mine... my mind was frozen... i was barely breathing... His hand plunged between my legs, his fingers poking into the wet slit.. whispering in my ear... ' nice... you love it don't you'.... pressing me harder against the wall, His finger jabbing at my pussy, but i'm tight, i'm tense... i began to cry....
He stands upright.. i hear footsteps.. a Man walks in.. i recognise him as one of His friends from the club.. He sees me, clothes awry.. tears down my cheeks, trembling.. He laughs... 'for fuck's sake Mate... she's not ready for the likes of You.. come on.. there's a party.. proper women there..' He stepped back, looking down at me, lifted His finger to graze my lips with my wantjuice... laughing low... 'maybe you're right'... He leant forward again, whispering into my ear, His hand tight at my throat... 'come find me, little girl... when you're ready'... then turned and walked away....
i closed my eyes.. panicing, catching my breathe, adjusting my clothes.. the walk home was horrid, legs still trembling.. scared of the dark... as i lay in bed later.... my hand rubbing at my clit, my cunt still sodden, images of the incidence replaying over and over again as i came...... the words like a chant in my head.. 'i'm ready, i'm ready.... i'm ready'
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