The funeral, actually, the cremation is over now,
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Posted:Jan 31, 2024 11:26 am
Last Updated:Feb 8, 2024 11:38 am 7870 Views
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I am back at my own place and soo terrible tired,
emotional overload and all that.....
so i wont be writing much, for now.....
All is well, as well can be, see the cirmunstances....
For my sister.....
And me.....
take care, keep warm and try to be happy... content.....
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24
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This week,
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Posted:Jan 21, 2024 8:47 am
Last Updated:Jan 21, 2024 12:47 pm 8813 Views
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The weather was somewhat better, so i decided to go to my workplace again.
There was snowy ice everywhere, so i walked some parts of the route.
nowwhere in sight, was anything remote looking like snow plowers, to get the bike paths clean!
NO where to be found!!
That pissess me off!
The car routes where all very clean, but the bike route?
Not so much, at all!
It was nice to be back at work
The Christmas trees needed to be domolished!
And put away.
So, that was what i did.
Talked to this one guy, he told me storys!!
My Oh My!
Some people did not get any change in life, just because their "parents" ......
well, anyway, most men there have the mental capacity of a three year old....
The cause and effect of their behaviour is not something that they know about....
or know how to deal with it...
responsibility, compassion?
One flew over the cuckoos nest, i assume you all know that movie?
I am telling you... that is what it is there, and then the lite version...
The staff is, so far, very good in calculation, who is capable, to deal with the kind of randomity that is around that place.
My friend Ronald was not there, has been sick, all week...
Being sick, in there, can mean all kind of things, booz or drugs related ...
Talked some with this one staff member, he explained some of the work schedules and some of the cleints/patients, there...
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5
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You would think, i am going to travel world wide?
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Posted:Jan 21, 2024 8:20 am
Last Updated:Jan 22, 2024 1:33 am 7918 Views
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My brother in law is gone walk about, or, if you believe in it,
gone to heaven.
This week is the cremation, my sister asked me if i would come to her place, for some days.
Ofcourse i will.
I am already planning the bus route....,
You would think i am going to travel the world, but it is only in the backlands!
Of Holland!!
Whahaha.
My god!!
Going to see all those littlle villages again, the bus will stop at almost every tree in sight!
Whahahahha
Anyway, that part is covered.
Going to stay a few days, see how my sister is doing, holding on.....
The one thing, that bothers me, is, i cant ask friends to feed my stray cat, because they have to come into my house and maybe go roaming around,
seeing things, that are no good, for them.....
Because, well, they are nosy, ... want to know....
Because they cant figure me out.....
But, if they find out!?
They then get mad at me, for their nosyness....
( happened before)
being shocked about the bdsm particles they might find ( out) about....?
Sm art on the bedroom wall, and things like that.. whips hanging around....?!
Sighs...
So, finger crossed, the cat will survive and comes back, when i am back.....
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14
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It wont take months, my sister said....
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Posted:Jan 15, 2024 2:40 pm
Last Updated:Jan 21, 2024 7:58 am 8871 Views
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Her husband is home.
In the hospital they finally decided, they cant get any money out of treatment any more,
so, they send him home, he also said, i want to die in my own house.
The thing is, they live in a very, very small elderly house.
There is no extra spare bedroom.
they have a small attic, but the care person is staying there, sleeping there too, 24/7.
There is no extra room, so my sister cant recharge herself,
She is constantly, 24/7 in the midst of his ailments, he coughing, his.... every part of him being sick and dying...
She cant take a pauze, or break, it are not nice weathers, so she also cant go outside for a walk or something.
Her whole house and household has been taken over by the care for her husband..
And i do understand that she wants to do this last bit for him,
i do....
I only see that she is not nearly keeping this all together, for herself...
Her daughters are around, the whole day too, coming and going,
Have to take care for their and husbands too...
I stay away, it is too much already, for my sister.
If they dont take care of her, this could be killing her, too.....
He has cancer everywhere.
breathing does not go well, pain everywhere.....
he is well taken care of...
When people come in that last phase, their skin gets a totall other colour, and they are smelling different, too...
I think he is already in that phase.......
I dont dare to ask this, because, well, they maybe think, iam rude to talk about it, in that manner...
But, to me, that are just the facts.
You cant sugarcoat the last phase anymore
it is what it is!
Maybe, if i asked this one , that she will understand....
It also a way , to prepare them, for what is coming...
Aah, maybe i should just shut my big mouth and let it all happen...?
i dont know...?
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31
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(Page:)
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Solution?
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Posted:Jan 12, 2024 7:50 am
Last Updated:Jan 15, 2024 2:23 pm 10021 Views
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Because i dont go outside, when it is extreem cold....
The staff thought it would be a good idea, that sour man, pick me up, from my house,
So i could come to work on the bikes, again...
Really?
So, i told them; Nah, i dont think so.....
They did not understood why i refused...their offer...
Really??
Sighs....
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18
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Satisfyer?
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Posted:Jan 10, 2024 12:21 pm
Last Updated:Jan 12, 2024 7:16 am 10488 Views
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This morning, on the national radio, this DJ was talking about this sex toy for women.
Yeah!
This is Holland, you know!!
It was on radio 10, i like this DJ very much, he also hates this climate and then some....
He is nice, makes a a great show.
They all were very giggly , giggly about this toy.
I dont know this toy.
It seems this toy works on air... ? and a sucking device....?
he asked his audience, to tell about their experience with this toy!
Some women did, and are very happy with this toy....
Because it is more focussed on the female anatomy....?
There was this one woman, who said; my man is my satisfyer......
Some men reacted too, being a bit upset, that women wont "need" them
anymore, with this new toy....
Yeah.....
Well, since the sex for most men is totally focussed on their dicks, the penatration..
that might be the case, for them....
There is more to sex, then just put your sausage in there...?!
Anyone on here, who experienced this toy?
it seems to be focussed on the clit..... ?
As if every woman, wants that body part being "tortured"?
I found it very funny, they were soo nervous, talking about this....
As if they were afraid, they become totally useless, when women buy this toy...
If you dont take the time to learn about the/ her female anatomy?
It is not one size fits all, boys! 
Yeah.....
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6
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so cold,
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Posted:Jan 9, 2024 3:34 am
Last Updated:Jan 10, 2024 1:51 am 11138 Views
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We have our second cold wave, here.
The temps are -10... but when you go outside it feels like the frost wants to tear your skin of your bones!
It feels like -15.
COLD! NOT NORMAL!
it is no fun, anymore.
Heating is on, 3 layers of thick sweaters, thermo, insulated stuff too.....
Still cold!
Yesterday, it was the same, went for the shops, close by,
i almost hyperventilated on my way back
and i know, when that happens, i am gone very fast....
So, i totally focussed on my breathing, nearly did not get any breath...
So, today, i stay inside!
wait untill this cold is over!!
Other Dutch people are totally enthousiastic about skating on natural ice....
sure??
When you have a death wish?
I totally dont understand people, who like to go walking in these temps, for fun?!
Fun!?
Even my balaclava did not keep the cold away, from some parts of my face.....
soo cold!!
Did not go to my work, too afraid to pass out, on my way to my work.....
lie there, somewhere on the road?!
To ski, i like, the air is much better, high up on those hills.
and the sun, does have some power, there!
The reflection does the trick,
here?
You get your skin bitten off, by the cold.
I hope the weather is nice to you, where ever you are.
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15
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The stray cat...
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Posted:Jan 6, 2024 10:36 am
Last Updated:Jan 10, 2024 1:39 am 13192 Views
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We are getting our second hit of cold weather...
Below zero...
"My?⁹" stray cat get his food in the shed, when it is bad weather.
Also, this day...
Most of the time, he stays, just inside of the shed...
So he can run, when he feels his life is in danger...
The other day, he lay down, just inside the door, to the hallway...
On the treshold...
Today, he lay down, inside the hallway, on the other side of the door, even!!
I was sooo proud of him!
Soooo....fingers crossed, he may get inside the house, when this bad weather gets worst...
And, maybe, just maybe, i am able to close the backdoor... when he decides to stay inside... for as long... as he can stands it...
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19
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Work, this guy.....
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Posted:Jan 5, 2024 10:06 am
Last Updated:Jan 7, 2024 3:49 am 13816 Views
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The bike i am working on, is getting along pretty well,
except for the brakes and the gear.
It drives me nuts, that i dont seem to get it.
And my man to go to, was not at the job,
so i got to figure it out, on my own...
Grrrr....
Then this sour man, did find it necessary to "help" me,
with all kind of strange advise, about disassemble the whole gear box!
Are you out of your brains! LOL
So, i told him, you stay away from my gearbox.
I will ask this Ronald guy...when ever he gets out of his booz stupor! Há.
Today, Ronald was, thanks the goddesses, back again.
And indeed, drank way tooo much liqour,
He had a rush job, with this bike, so he could not help me..
Instead, i cleaned out more tool boxes, my god!! The stuff they collected???
We talked about my bike, he told me, how to do this....
But i was blank, i did not get it into my head!!
Just not!
So, we agreed, he would help me, next tuesday, fine
I am a very visual, oriented person, i have to see it, in the flesh, so to say....
There is this other guy working there, i find him attractive.
he is from Ucraine.
He is a intelligent guy, just like this Ronald guy....
So, i try to talk with him, translate on his phone did help a lot.
Then, all of the sudden, he wanted to meet at my house?!
HUH???
I hate men, who dont have any patience, decency, and are very clear, about what they are after....
How disgusting!
So i told him, i dont want to meet him, we can talk here.
Told him, about the husband of my sister....
being terminal ill....
NO EMPATHY WHAT SO EVER.
NO COMPASSION, AT ALL
Well, so much for being intelligent. amp;
I, ofcourse, are already done, with him.
This time, i stayed later then normal, i was in the shop,
talking with this couple, customers of the shop,
They were soo open and friendly, did come from the West of Holland,
so we clicked, inmediately got to talking about all kind of stuff
I totally forgot the tea break, came back into my part of the building
all of the sudden, it seem to be 4 oclock?
How did that happen!
So i asked for my pay and got to talking with this W guy, one of the staff.
We talked about this SAD thing, my family background,
i think i shocked him, with my background story..
And i am always very carefull to tell the light version of my life, background....
Never give to much details, just the overall picture...
I dont have any charge on that story, anymore, so for me, it is...
Nah, not really a bedtime story,  but more, this was our normal,
So?
Most people cant handle the real harsh true... And i do understand that.
All in all, it was a great day, although it rained and rained, and rained!!
Gosh......
The rain is going away, so now we are getting below zero temps
and maybe even snow and ice.... terrible cold winds, too.....
Gosh!!  
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7
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Health,
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Posted:Dec 31, 2023 2:11 pm
Last Updated:Jan 1, 2024 8:54 am 16542 Views
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When older people, have to go to the hospital and get pneumonia,
it is most of the time, the end of the show.
Ofcourse, doctors, try their best,
But are very bad in accepting that life sometimes, is just over! done!
and try and try, beyond what is considered respectful to that elderly person.
Have seen it happen, to my daddy...
To a friend too...
The husband of my sister, in the hospital, is having pneumonia, on top of all the other ailments.....
broken collarbone and gods knows what else....?
Well, metastases everywhere.....
Ofcourse, although he is terminal, the doctors still keep pushing meds in to his system.
He is getting antibiotica......
Sometimes i really wonder, how much money those doctors get, by doing so....
I find this behaviour so very unethical.
He is terminal, help him, by giving him painmeds, so he is able to make the move over....
Not try to make his conditions worst, if that is even possible...
This is a very strange old and new year -celebration- Not so!
I am just waiting for that one call, telling me, he is dead...
I believe they should bring him, to a hospice, so he can die in peace with the right kind of care....
No hassle, anymore....
I offered my sister to come to her place, go with her to her husband in the hospital, is she wants that....
She was very glad with this offer....
That is all i can do....
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13
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